Situational Dad Joke
Found in the wild, mod approved
https://m.imgur.com/vhXCWN8
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 01 2018
The Covid19 situation has been particularly stressful for the Flat Earth Society.
They fear social distancing measures will push someone over the edge.
π︎ 293
π
︎ Jan 10 2021
Sticky situation
π︎ 4k
π
︎ Sep 10 2020
What do you call a situation when you don't feel like digging holes anymore?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 24 2020
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Dec 28 2020
My friend to said to me "there's no situation where a contraction makes sense but its split from doesnt"
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 05 2020
Jeff it looks like youβre in a ruff situation..
π︎ 46
π
︎ Sep 22 2020
Did you guys know that ducks are terrible in tense situations?
They tend to quack under pressure.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Oct 14 2020
Our current situation in a nutshell
π︎ 4
π
︎ Oct 09 2020
Damn that's a sticky situation
π︎ 41
π
︎ Jul 09 2020
Saw a deal earlier to stay on a canal boat but I was worried about covid situation
There's bound to be a lock down there
π︎ 11
π
︎ Sep 22 2020
My wife said she'll leave me if I don't stop the laundry puns
So from today I'm detergent to be better.
π︎ 18
π
︎ Jan 17 2021
Hairy situation
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jul 25 2020
The local police station has had its toilet stolen
Officers have nothing to go on.
π︎ 174
π
︎ Dec 17 2020
People who aren't impressed by pictures of a Black Hole clearly don't understand the gravity of the situation.
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Nov 30 2019
An ether/oar situation...
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Jun 10 2019
FBI has just announced about a mole on their organization. They are consulting Harry Potter about the situation
since he is good at catching snitches
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jul 02 2020
He made a pun out of an autocorrect situation
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Aug 03 2019
Making light of the situation
π︎ 33
π
︎ Mar 19 2020
Situation under control
π︎ 83
π
︎ Aug 17 2019
A punny take on the coronavirus situation using movies/tv series as puns
π︎ 10
π
︎ Apr 12 2020
A Harry Situation
π︎ 23
π
︎ Jan 11 2020
What do you call a dog with knowledge or perception of a situation or fact?
π︎ 6
π
︎ May 25 2020
A truck carrying Worcestershire sauce crashed the other day. The dispatcher asked for the situation
The officer replied: βItβs hard to sayβ
π︎ 16
π
︎ Apr 06 2020
Did you hear about the situation in which a black, 17 year old excavator robbed a small convenience store?
It was a minor minority minor miner notoriety.
π︎ 63
π
︎ Nov 30 2019
What do you call someone who has the ability to pull off a lie in every situation?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jun 01 2020
My girlfriend said if I donβt marry her then sheβll destroy my hearing
Itβs a wife or deaf situation
Credit for idea: https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/l5550w/my_girlfriend_says_if_we_dont_get_married_soon/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 26 2021
Situation under....
π︎ 21
π
︎ Jan 27 2020
I donβt think you understand the gravity of this situation
π︎ 17
π
︎ Jan 17 2020
My son borrows money from me every week, so I told him, βI donβt think you understand the seriousness of your debt situation.β
He said, βOh please. You should really give me a bit more credit.β
π︎ 8
π
︎ Mar 19 2020
Andy was frustrated.
His wife always complained that he wasn't good enough in bed and that she wasn't satisfied.
He went to the local bar to get a drink and cool off for a bit. On reaching the bar, he ordered a beer and sat down.
His friend, Mike saw him sitting alone and walked up to him.
He asked Andy what happened to which Andy told him the situation. Mike said that he had a simple trick which never failed and told Andy to hit his meat on the bedpost three times before sex.
Andy rushed home to perform this trick.
He saw that his wife was lying on the bed with the lights off. Slowly he took off his pants and hit his meat three times on the bedpost. Dum, dum, dum.
His wife immediately woke up and shouted, "Mike, is that you?"
π︎ 3
π
︎ Feb 08 2021
I cannot and will not ever use a plastic knife in any situation
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 01 2020
We've got a domestic situation here
π︎ 29
π
︎ Aug 27 2019
A man should always carry a knife. It can cut your food, open beer bottles, be a screwdriver, or even be used as a toothpick. It works great for cleaning your fingernails, and it's quite useful in an emergency situation
like when you have to change someone's mind.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Dec 10 2019
Don't worry the situation is under control
π︎ 48
π
︎ Aug 19 2019
Situation under cntrl
π︎ 31
π
︎ Nov 24 2019
If we would explain the the current US political situation to the 2010 us at a fantasy fare, they would jokingly call it some batshit magic 'Hocus POTUS'...
π︎ 2
π
︎ Feb 09 2020
Jesus grew up poor but...
At least he was born in a stable situation.
π︎ 159
π
︎ Dec 03 2020
Being cooped up in the house for so long has led me to attempt new hobbies. As an example, I'm currently studying how to adapt French phrases to describe the situation.
You could say it's my maison d'Γͺtre.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Mar 30 2020
Just imagine.... a world without hypothetical situations
π︎ 23
π
︎ Jul 19 2019
I don't think he understands the gravity of this situation.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Dec 10 2019
I failed a recent test on the forces of the earth.
Apparently I didnβt understand the gravity of the situation I was in
π︎ 12
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
I used to be really bad at geometry.
But thankfully Iβve turned that situation around 360 degrees
π︎ 104
π
︎ Nov 11 2020
My son kept chewing on live electrical wires
π︎ 822
π
︎ Jun 29 2020
Trump's top aides have Coronavirus
It would appear he has a staff infection
π︎ 16
π
︎ Oct 07 2020
A sticky situation
π︎ 90
π
︎ Sep 01 2019
The COVID19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.
They fear that the social distancing measures could push people over the edge.
π︎ 20k
π
︎ Apr 28 2020
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
