5 Hilarious Sideburns Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

What does Apollo, god of the sun, do when his sideburns get too long?

Eclipse them

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👤︎ u/intrepid604

📅︎ Oct 29 2020

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If you have to have sideburns to prove your masculinity

...then you need to grow a pair.

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👤︎ u/viskossity

📅︎ Aug 11 2019

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My daughter asked that I not be funny when her friend came over because she said, I’m unorthodox. I offered to grow my sideburns out and wear a hat so then I would look fully orthodox.

‘That’s exactly what I mean’ she said

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👤︎ u/Irv-Elephant

📅︎ Jan 10 2019

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Once there was a young man called Benny who rescued a leprechaun....

... In return the leprechaun said he would live young and healthy forever as long as he never shaved his beard. Benny live for many, many, many years always young and healthy and had a glorious beard. One day, as can happen to any man, Benny met a beautiful woman. After a wonderful courtship he asked her to marry him. She agreed on the condition that he shave his beard. Benny thought about this for a long time and tried a few things like trimming his beard really short to see what would happen. When nothing happened he decided he could probably risk shaving his beard but leaving his mustache and sideburns. As soon as you finish shaving the leprechaun appeared, shook his head, and snapped his fingers. Benny immediately dropped to the floor and turned into a pile of dust. His fiance was so upset that she could not bear to part with him. So she put his dust into a beautiful Grecian urn. Which just goes to show a Benny shaved is a Benny urned.

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👤︎ u/Fedoranz

📅︎ Aug 05 2017

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Dadjoked my barber last night...

"Do you want your sideburns any shorter?"

"Yes please, but just a hair."

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👤︎ u/MentalMuse

📅︎ Jan 22 2014

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