Looking for shark puns! Hoping I could get some help here.
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2015
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A hammerhead shark made from hammer heads
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vermillion_-_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20
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What do sharks eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
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Why do sharks swim in salt water?

Because they would sneeze in pepper water!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sleepypanda59
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
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What do you call a sad shark?

A woebegone Wobbegong.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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What shark doesn't have any friends?

A loan shark

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pollrobots
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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Why do sharks live in saltwater?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlankPhotos
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05
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Heard a guy swimming yelling β€œHELP, SHARK, HELP!!!”

And i just kept laughing because i knew that shark wasn’t going to help

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shitz-and-gigglez
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20
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A shark tried eating a boat but he didn’t like it

Didn’t have enough vitamin sea

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 02
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What’s a shark’s favorite meal?

Fish & Ships

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Daily_Vinyl
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
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My family ate thresher shark for the first time yesterday. My dad took a bite and said

Look at me!!! A man eating shark!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/roscoe9420
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
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How do sharks share memes?

On the finternet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ceruleanlunacy
πŸ“…︎ May 16
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What do you get when you cross a cow with a shark?

I don’t know but I wouldn’t wanna milk it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/carlazuzcnn10
πŸ“…︎ May 17
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When a guy I know meets people, he says he likes to treat them to shark fishing on his boat...

He says he's gotten a lot of chums that way.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29
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Shark: Once, I had a tough fight with an octopus.

He was well-armed.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/khAngnghiEmm
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25
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Why do sharks swim in saltwater?

Because pepperwater makes 'em sneeze.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
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What do you call the soft tissue between a shark’s teeth?

The slowest swimmer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arkham_Asylum27
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26
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🦈 Shark 🦈!!
πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Puppyismycat
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06
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There is a higher chance of being struck by lightning than to be killed in a shark attack.

Shocking isn't it.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crackshot666
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10
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What did the shark say before getting married?

Yes I do, do do do do do do!

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ready373
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15
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Channel Shark News

I wrote a little skit for my grandkids let's see how much I remember. CHUM 8 news Ted Hammerhead reporting with sky Chompter traffic report. Top story, a lone shark, who is a loan shark is alone in the dark making loans to sharks! There is a new place to gamble, the place is full of sharks who turn out to be card sharks playing card games with sharks on the cards. Imagune the dogs playing poker for this story, but it's sharks. The other reporter asks Ted Hammerhead how he did on his recent drivers test, Ted responds "nailed it". Crime scene where a clown has been killed and the Detective states, " No way a shark did this as they taste funny". On a comment about the victim. I never did the weather or figured out names for the other reporters we used to laugh and laugh at my stupid puns.

Edit: I can't spell fixed typos

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Phroedrick
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15
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ViCiOuS ShArK EaTs PoOr PuPpY
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πŸ‘€︎ u/glitchomojo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
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Looking for a female shark name pun

I have this weird superhero school project thing. I have the male sharks name (Finnley), but I'm struggling to think of one for a female shark.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jesusmusk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
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What’s a shark favorite game?

Swallow the leader

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jothebest75
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16
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Why don't sharks eat clowns?

They taste funny

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalBeastt
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07
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Why do sharks swim in salt water?

If they swam in pepper water they would sneeze.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lvrcerosis
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05
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Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?

Because it was well armed.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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If fishing for a shark is called shark fishing, what do you call fishing for a whale?

Whale mammaling...

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MadFluffyScience
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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A hammerhead shark
πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Grindingslimes
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
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a HAMMERhead shark!
πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/equishh
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
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The Hammerhead Hammerhead Shark
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zach5585
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
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Why do kids like β€œBaby Shark” so much?

They just do do do do do do do.

πŸ‘︎ 129
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doctor_Nutsack
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
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Poor Shark has a Loose Canine
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nirenyderp
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
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My jackass husband just hit me with this one. Pretend you are on a boat surrounded by sharks. How do you survive?

You stop pretending.

πŸ‘︎ 206
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thehornyghost
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
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A BEAUTIFUL HAMMERHEAD SHARK
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drewthepooh72
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
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Did you know the girl eaten by the shark in Jaws had dandruff?

Her head and shoulders washed up on the beach.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theisiscrisis
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
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Who brings baby sharks their presents on Christmas?

Santa Jaws

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fingadod
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
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Everyone is afraid of snakes and spiders and sharks but you have all forgotten about the scariest animal of all.

The cari-BOO

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ImNotThaaatDrunk
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
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What do you do when you're surrounded by a school of sharks?

You give them detention.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Duccnator
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
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A hammerhead shark
πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imploding_GoatZ
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
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Sharks live in saltwater,

But only because pepper water would make them sneeze.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/makerofrages
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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Makes a joke about sharks in honour of shark week
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πŸ‘€︎ u/queenettt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2019
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So I hear they're coming out with another sequel to Undertale, but this time, the final boss is an extinct giant shark.

His boss battle theme will be called Megalodonia.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brisingr2
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
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Know why geese kill more humans every year than sharks?

Because it's really hard for geese to kill sharks.

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/whomikehidden
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
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Pretend you are on a raft in the middle of the ocean surrounded by sharks. You only have a one day supply of water and a harpoon. What do you do?

Stop pretending.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hibdob
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2019
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Shark is having a ruff day
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
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It’s a lemon shark
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Superkyle14
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
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[OC] The prehistoric shark in a limbo competition asked the presiding official, Don, to lower the bar. β€œLow enough?” Don asked.

β€œNo, I want it even lower. I want it mega-low, Don.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/budcuddly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
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This hammerhead shark made of hammer heads.
πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/reddituser_373
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
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A hammerhead shark imgur.com/gK5O8W5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/metalhoernchen
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the woman who went on vacation and got bit by a shark?

Her trip cost her an arm and a leg.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PurpelBananas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
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I was at the beach and saw this guy in the water yelling, β€œHelp, shark! Help!

I just laughed because I knew that shark wasn’t going to help him.

πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
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Why did the shark not eat the lawyer?

Professional courtesy

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DOOM500YT
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
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Where do sharks go on holiday?

Finland!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hz1234
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
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Teacher: Okay class, tell me what scares you most. Let's start with Paul. Paul: Werewolves Nina: Sharks Dylan: The unstoppable march of time that us guiding us all to our inevitable demise.

Catherine: Dylan.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2019
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Shark eat shark world
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deathlysin
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What kinda food can a shark get cavities from?

SWEDISH FISH!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashtehstampede
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Where does all the sharks live?

In finland.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jasq
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2019
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A shark bumps into a dolphin...

and the dolphin says, "Did you do that on porpoise?"

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShadeTreeMechanix
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the shark cross the barrier reef?

To get to the other tide.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/phyllisTheWebDev
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
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You’re a great white shark, Kevin.
πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kappaman69
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Why didn’t the shark want to fight the octopus?

Because he knew the octopus was well-armed.

πŸ‘︎ 349
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πŸ‘€︎ u/devnodegree
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2018
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I don't understand why people get attacked by Sharks....

Can they not hear the music?

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeevesPoltergist
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
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My friend was telling me about how a shark attacked her while she was diving

I told her, that bites.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cantseemeatall
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do sharks go to sell the things they’ve stolen?

A prawn shop.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2019
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A shark tells his friends hes going vegan

They all look at him in shock "I was being sharkastic guys"

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KellznTheGuardian
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
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taking a dog named shark to the beach

...is a very bad idea...

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mellon_coliee
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Oh, hi shark!
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jimichael
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross anxiety meds with an ancient shark and a penis?

A Mogolodong.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/palordrolap
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
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DONT TAKE A DOG TO THE BEACH CALLED SHARK
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RIGHT_WING_X
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a hippie swimming in the sea with a shark approaching him.

I shouted to warn him but he couldn't hear me as he was too far out man.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BenisbacK_1900
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
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How does a shark stay in shape?

Jawsercise

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/showerdrinking
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
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What kind of pants do sharks wear?

Denim.....denim.....denim....denim....denim...

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/snapbackfat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
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A shark tells his friends hes gone vegan

They all look at him in shock. "Don't worry I was only being sharkastic"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KellznTheGuardian
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the loan shark tell the pastry chef as he was choking?

Cough up the dough

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2019
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I'm allergic to sharks..

..one shark bite and it's straight to the ER for me.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2019
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine was eaten by a shark...

He was a good chum

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the shark have for breakfast?

Alan Rickman

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NaturalLet
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
My camera was low on storage, so I was only able to photograph a shark attacking a seal.

It’s just one kilo-byte.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Harperhampshirian
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do sharks live in salt water

Because pepper water makes then sneeze

πŸ‘︎ 85
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PrincessKitty4
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2018
🚨︎ report
Shark-flavoured crocodile tears, A5
πŸ‘︎ 73
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CluKInCok
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2018
🚨︎ report
What do great white sharks and tupperware sales ladies have in common?

They're all about a great seal

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Genomademe
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
🚨︎ report
My buddy told me to watch out for loan sharks

But I always figured multiple would be worse

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/garboooge
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark?

Do not consume if seal is broken.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hackerman79_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Do sharks have a favorite way to eat food?

Gnaw

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cyphr0st
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Yesterday I witnesseded a very odd behaviour of a shark, it just swam beside other fish without any intention to harm it

I think it followed ocean's ethical cod.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Oded_Gendelman
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Why don't sharks eat clowns?

Because they taste funny.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?

Because it was well armed.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?

Because it was well armed.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Why don't sharks eat clowns?

Because they taste funny.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?

Because it was well armed.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?

Because it was well armed.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?

Because it was well armed.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gertjan-96
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2019
🚨︎ report

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