I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Do your worst!
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies π
It really does, I swear!
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
BamBOO!
Theyβre on standbi
A play on words.
My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.
Pilot on me!!
^("I am the Thorax. I speak for the bees. The bees say nothing, for they cannot speak." - The Thorax, shortly before being stung a few too many times)
Beetrooper is easily one of my favorite decks of late and while it might be true that they consist of mostly extenders, I'll have you know that they do not have nearly enough.
| Monster: 33 | Ratio | What the Bug Doin |
|---|---|---|
| Digital Bug Centibit | 3 | Something of a Brick unless you open Resistrider or Websolder but if you do, he helps the Extra Deck Effort. And if you don't but you have some Beetles, its nearly the same effect. |
| Digital Bug Resistrider | 3 | I still love him. Perfection incarnate, Normal Summon any level 3 bug (i.e.: most of them), and he leaps from your hand, letting you do Good Digital Bug Things if you are so inclined. And you might be. This deck offers many avenues of fun. |
| Digital Bug Websolder | 3 | You'll always want to have a copy in hand. He's completely wonderful letting you extend directly into Beetroopers if you want. |
| Digital Bug Cocoondenser | 3 | The hardest of the Todd Howard Special to make good use of but with setup, grants you some minor extension. |
| Battlewasp - Sting the poison | 2 | Searches the Bees. Go with Pin or Twinbow, there's no wrong answer. |
| Battlewasp - Pin the Bullseye | 2 | Extends. Burns cutely. |
| Battlewasp - Twinbow the Attacker | 3 | Extends. |
| Beetrooper Sting Lancer | 2 | Big heavy option. Its a shame he targets. He's also your S/T searcher and, he's a bee of some variety. We love that. |
| Beetrooper Scale Bomber | 3 | Extends, offers a negate, very clever name. |
| Heavy Beetrooper Mighty Neptune | 1 | Recycles main deck monsters. Flies in. 3k attack. Hands you 1k. Refuses to elaborate, or leave. |
| Beetrooper Scout Buggy | 3 | He's 20 bucks a piece right now. A summon makes him a link 2, he's got great art, and a punny name. A good boy! |
| Beetrooper Assault Roller | 1 | This deck no longer minds banishing its own materials so I have no issue running Aztekipede But Better in this very deck. This is how you make a dung beetle look excellent. Take notes. |
| Beetrooper Light Flapper | 1 | This is Pequod arriving shortly at LZ. Folks on this very sub balked at him and I almost don't see why. He's not perfect, and isn't what they needed, and I wish he was level 4. But his effect is great though, letting you refresh your options and recycling homies that have been banished; all in the name of the Fusion Effort or whatever else you might have planned. On his own he makes 3 materials for you (for |
Christopher Walken
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Or would that be too forward thinking?
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
When I got home, they were still there.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
I won't be doing that today!
Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
[Removed]
Where ever you left it π€·ββοΈπ€
There hasn't been a post all year!
You take away their little brooms
It was about a weak back.
Itβs pronounced βNoel.β
