Scoping Puns

A list of puns related to "Scoping"

I met my partner after we both reached for the same rifle scope.

You know what they say, love at first sight.

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/wolfyfancylads
📅︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
How do demons find out about their future?

They read a horror-scope.

👍︎ 14
💬︎
👤︎ u/Bbew_Mot
📅︎ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a tube you can see things crashing in?

A collide-o-scope.

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/vivvav
📅︎ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
My significant other asked why I never take them out

I said that the scope is broken on my high powered rifle

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/MrPeanut76
📅︎ Jan 31 2021
🚨︎ report
How does a scientist freshen their breath?

With experi-mints!

👍︎ 52
💬︎
👤︎ u/notdadbot
📅︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
When your horoscope says you are going to fall ill this month

It's more of a horror scope

👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/kyool_
📅︎ Apr 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the scientists who discovered there are bank clerks on the moon?

They saw them through their teller-scopes.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/aaron2571
📅︎ Apr 30 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you know if a sniper loves you?

He misses you

👍︎ 18
💬︎
👤︎ u/CustomAtomicDress
📅︎ Apr 22 2019
🚨︎ report
In 1925, the courts ruled on whether primates can use mouthwash.

It was during the Scope monkey trial.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/wmyspr
📅︎ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend and her younger sisters (21 and 9) were adopted by lesbian parents. I'm going to be the only dad joke source in their lives and it's a big responsibility that I take seriously. Any suggestions are welcomed.

For the youngest siblings recent 9th birthday I put 9 dollars in a block of ice (had to bribe a local butcher shop to let me put a cooler in their freezer, worth it) But I need some long term ideas, because I intend to show this family with a lack of dads the full scope of dad jokes

👍︎ 56
💬︎
👤︎ u/MANTHEFUCKUPBRO
📅︎ Nov 22 2016
🚨︎ report
A student got me today

Three students had four microscopes set up to look at specimens for biology lab today. They moved from one microscope to the next as a group. I asked why they were doing this instead of one person per microscope. One of them replied "we are just scoping things out."

👍︎ 11
💬︎
👤︎ u/teamsloth
📅︎ Nov 26 2014
🚨︎ report
My dad had a colonoscopy...

Me: "Are you all right dad? It wasn't too bad, was it?"

Dad: "It was a pain in the arse."

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/IanWoansBatCave
📅︎ May 14 2015
🚨︎ report
The project management office tried to open a pharmacy but went out of business due to poor sales of mouthwash.

They were out of SCOPE.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/greg_zielinski
📅︎ Mar 16 2018
🚨︎ report
I was playing Battlefield 1 a while ago.

I was playing Battlefield 1 a while ago. I sneezed as I did a quick scope kill.

Talk about a sick shot.

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/Somebody_Named_Wyatt
📅︎ Oct 02 2016
🚨︎ report
I spilled my mouthwash all over the place and nobody cares...

I guess they just don't understand the Scope of the situation..

👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/Jomajorsh
📅︎ Aug 21 2016
🚨︎ report
hunting dad

Dad:I can't wait for hunting season. Mom: You never shoot anything, I don't get you. Dad:Its just nice being outside and sometimes I look through the scope and almost pull the trigger. Mom:Of course you do honey you're such a cute wuss sometimes. Dad:Good thing for you I am Mom:Why'd you say that honey? Dad: Sometimes you're very deer to me sweetheart

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/iforgotoops
📅︎ May 22 2016
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.