Why do fish live in salt water?
Because if they lived in pepper water, they would sneeze.
I love salt jokes...
They’re just sodium funny
If you have the soldiers named Salt and Pepper in your squad then consider yourself lucky.
They're seasoned veterans
When asked if he had family in Salt Lake City, Robert de Niro replied,
True story: As kids, my sister and I were fighting over the TV remote and it got heated. The remote flew across the room and a couple AAA batteries fell out. My sister threw one at me, and I grabbed a nearby salt shaker and threw it at her.
My mother, who was watching this go down, just laughs and says, "Assault and battery!"
She then left the room, cackling.
So proud of my daughter for this one... "Why do fishes swim in salt water?"
Because pepper would make them sneeze!
She's six. She's awesome.
EDIT: Woo highest rated post, thanks to my kid. Also, I never said she wrote it! She just told it to me. So there.
What’s the difference between a molecule of table salt and the late Sean Connery?
One has an ionic bond. The other was the iconic Bond.
My therapist said the best treatment for depression is to vigorously rub salt into my skin, to draw out excess moisture....
I heard a salt joke the other day.
Who does Mr. Salt go to when he has back pain?
A salt with a deadly weapon!
WARNING: There is an email going around offering processed pork, Gelatin and salt in a can. If you get this email DO NOT OPEN
Lawyer - Is it crime to throw salt in someone's eyes?
Judge - Yes, that's assault!
Lawyer - I know it's a salt but is it a crime?
Son: There's no salt on this. Mom: Well, it's hard to see salt.
Dad: But can you table salt?
Mom: I don't know, let's discuss that next time.
Edit: To be honest I'm a little salty about the bland reaction this dad/mom joke got :)
I was supposed to go to a salt n pepa concert next week
Unfortunately, due to the coronavirus they had to push it
What did the angry salt say to the rest of the spices?
Wife: We are out of salt.
I work in a kitchen and my colleague threw a satchet of salt at me and said
You’ve just been a-salted
Next time you see a packet of salt at a restaurant, throw it at your friend.
Then say, “That’s a salt!”
How did salt’s friend survive the apocalypse
I lived in Salt Lake Utah
That makes me a SLUT resident
How many grains of salt are in a salt shaker.
Hey son, today I told your science teacher a joke about salt, and she said...
What type of salt has the best vision?
Damn this pink salt is looking real good today.
What’s the opposite of Himalayan salt?
Herastandin pepper.
Courtesy of my very own father
Salt
So i wanted to tell a joke about Salt but i was like Na
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper water would make them sneeze.
Why do seals swim in salt water ?
Because, pepper water makes them sneeze.
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
I was supposed to go to a salt an pepa concert last week
Unfortunately, due to lockdown, they had to push it
Why do sharks swim in salt water?
Because they would sneeze in pepper water!
Why do sharks swim in salt water?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because if they lived in pepper water, they would sneeze.
If you get an email about pork salt and fat, don't open it.
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