I was following a cow down a road when there was suddenly a terribly bright light that reflected off the cow. The cow was suddenly gone and only water vapor remained.
It was a glaring mist steak.
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π
︎ Jun 21 2022
Where do bad rainbows go?
Prism.
It is just a light sentence
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π
︎ Jun 27 2022
The worst part about kissing a perfect 10 is
How cold the mirror feels on my lips
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︎ May 03 2022
A burglar stole all my lamps
I should be upset but Iβm delighted
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π
︎ Jul 08 2022
Sometimes I like to reflect on when I've used my favorite spice.
π︎ 17
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︎ Feb 06 2022
I applied for a job hanging mirrors.
It's something I can see myself doing.
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Apr 12 2022
On reflection !!!
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π
︎ Sep 02 2021
Did God make you, Grandpa?"
"Yes, God made me" the grandfather answered.
A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me, too?"
"Yes, He did," the older man replied.
For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her grandfather wondered what was running through her little mind.
At last she spoke up. "You know, Grandpa," she said, "God's doing a lot better job, lately, isn't he?"
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︎ Jun 23 2022
Reflecting on Prince Philip death, I was chatting with the Mrs and I said, I know Iβm getting a little older, but I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.
She got up, unplugged my laptop and threw out my beerβ¦.
EDIT: Thanks for the kind awards... My first ever! β€οΈ
π︎ 4k
π
︎ Apr 09 2021
I applied for a job at a mirror store
I could really see myself working there.
π︎ 65
π
︎ Jun 03 2022
What did the lion say to its own reflection?
π︎ 7
π
︎ Nov 24 2021
do you know why Dracula had so much trouble keeping friends?
He was a real pain in the neck : (
π︎ 10
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︎ May 17 2022
My friend complained to me about his weird condition - he hears every "l" as "f".
On reflection, I probably shouldn't have wished him the best of luck.
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︎ Jul 13 2022
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︎ Jun 24 2021
Memories
I found a recipe from Moroccan Dinner rolls
I called for fresh thyme and all I had was some that was way out of date but I couldnβt find anything else so I used it hahaha.
But now that I reflect I really did like those old Thyme Morrocan Rolls
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jul 11 2022
Iβve always thought that crafting mirrors
Is a job I see myself doing
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jun 01 2022
I would really like to work at a mirror factory.
it's just something i can really see myself doing.
π︎ 180
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︎ Feb 25 2022
I was going to tell you a joke about a mirror, but didn't think you'd take it seriously.
You need to reflect on that.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jun 23 2022
To the person who stole my mirrorβ¦
β¦I hope you take time to reflect on your actions.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jun 03 2022
I was in an interview and they asked me where I see myself in 10 years
I said the same place I see myself now, in the mirror
π︎ 267
π
︎ Jan 22 2022
Why is narcissus good at owning his mistakes?
He spends a lot of time self-reflecting
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jun 16 2022
Maybe I should clean mirrors for a living.
It's something I can really see myself doing.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Nov 17 2021
Why are vampires bad at working out their issues?
Because they have no self-reflection.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Jan 08 2022
My wife just asked me to return a mirror next time I head to Lowes.
I responded, βSure, thatβs something I could see myself doing.β
π︎ 650
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︎ Nov 07 2021
I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror one evening admiring my reflection, when I posed this question to my wife of 30 years, βWill you still love me when Iβm old, fat, and balding?β She smiled and answered...
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π
︎ Mar 27 2021
Why did the banana always stare at his reflection?
Because he thought he was very apPEELing
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 17 2020
After a long hour of deep internal reflection
π︎ 475
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︎ May 29 2019
Delighted to say I've finally got a new job installing mirrors!
Nothing fancy, but was something I could always see myself doing.
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Apr 24 2021
Sometimes, I stop and reflect on last year.
As they say, hindsight is 2020.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 09 2021
What is an easy way to double your money?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 27 2022
Why are all vampires narcissists?
Because they're incapable of self-reflection
π︎ 213
π
︎ Jan 05 2022
A vampire was confused at his reflection
He wondered, what happened to the man in the mirror?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Feb 11 2021
I used to hate mirrors
But upon reflection, I decided that I really don't.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Mar 06 2022
On reflection, there's a lot of stuff I'd like to have done differently this past year.
But hey, hindsight is 2020
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 31 2020
To the person who stole my running shoes and reflective vest...
You can run, but you can't hide!
π︎ 30
π
︎ May 27 2020
Why does the communist like the Laws of reflection? Because I=R
Because I = Our, get it? (I am aware of the pronoun change, this is a joke mate)
π︎ 10
π
︎ Apr 03 2019
I knew a guy who disliked reflective headgear
You can say he was a matte hatter.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Oct 24 2020
People who hate how they look in the mirror are seeing their own reflect-shun
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 04 2020
I re-skinned my drums with the skin my faithful steed Chestnut. I want people to reflect on the emotional connection between man and beast through the art of drum solos.
But my wife says I'm just beating a dead horse.
π︎ 34
π
︎ Sep 20 2019
Most people really hate when cars have a super reflective wrap, they think itβs too showoffy.
Personally, I can see myself in one of them.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Aug 08 2020
Photons have mass?
Who knew they were Catholic?!
π︎ 66
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︎ Sep 10 2021
Page 22.) βYour Reflectionβ
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 04 2020
Thinking about getting into the mirror business
It's a job I can really see myself doing.
π︎ 23
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︎ Oct 25 2021
My friend said he couldn't play with us because he had to write a "600 words reflection" so I did one for him
π︎ 10
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︎ May 08 2020
You know what they say about hindsight!
π︎ 7k
π
︎ Apr 03 2020
Where do rainbows go when they commit a crime?
to prism
for a light sentence
π︎ 3k
π
︎ Jul 07 2022
Where do rainbows go when theyβre bad?
Prism. Itβs a light sentence.
π︎ 3k
π
︎ May 17 2022
I applied for a job hanging mirrors.
Itβs something I can see myself doing.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Apr 14 2022
Where do bad rainbows go?
Prism
It's a light sentence.
π︎ 922
π
︎ Jul 30 2021
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