I was in a job interview yesterday and the interviewer asked if I can perform under pressure.
I said “No, but I can perform Bohemian Rhapsody.”
My blood pressures have been great all year!
-- My 8y/o with a chronic illness, after taking their BP this morning
I'm so proud
A thief stole the wheels off my car last night...
I'm working tirelessly to catch him.
Did you know you can create fake marijuana in a pressure cooker?
Do you know why it's a lot of pressure to be a calculator?
It's because everyone is always counting on them
I went for an interview. They said, "Can you perform under pressure?"
I said, "I'm not sure about that but I can have a good crack at Bohemian Rhapsody."
You have to watch your blood pressure when playing in a brass band...
Or else you might get deep vein trombone-sis.
Why do most bakers feel pressured to drink?
Their lifestyles are very whisk-y
What do you call a melon that is facing a lot of pressure to have a big wedding?
Did you know that Neal Diamond’s birth name was Neal Coal?
It was the pressure that made him into the singer he became.
It might crack under pressure.
Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are locked in battle, and Vader says to Luke, "I know what you're getting for Christmas." Luke says, "No, that's impossible, how could that be?" Vader leans in closer, their lightsabers crackling under the pressure, and he replies...
I didn’t need to pee but all my friends were so…
I gave in to peer pressure.
I feel strong peel pressure when all my friends start eating bananas.
I hate peer pressure
Unless my friends like it, then I guess it's cool
Did you hear about the anti-masker who went scuba diving?
Fun fact: Oxygen solidifies at -218,79°C.
Today I asked a woman if she would like another beer. I added,
Don't ever tell an egg secrets...
They always crack under pressure.
I once entered a weather pun competition.
I beat the raining champion.
Why would an egg be a terrible criminal?
They crack under pressure.
They tried to make a diamond shaped like a duck.
It quacked under the pressure.
A diuretic, an ACE inhibitor and a beta blocker walk into a bar...
Bartender just looks up and says "no pressure."
My scale stopped working.
I think it was under too much pressure!
I don’t think I can go scuba diving…
It’s just too much pressure.
My future boss asked if i could perform under pressure.
I said "No, but I can do a great Bohemian Rhapsody"
I never wanted to go to the docks, but after my friends pestered me for an hour I finally gave into pier pressure
Someone asked me who I like better, Queen or David Bowie
I said thats putting me under pressure
What do you get when you mix alcohol with pressure in a small space?
Comments in a bike forum went crazy
Why was nobody able to go on the dock anymore
Because it collapsed under Pier pressure
What do you call the pressure Microsoft is under to compete with iPad?
I had a job interview yesterday and the interviewer asked how well I perform under pressure.
I told them I was far better at playing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I went for an interview. They said, “Can you perform under pressure?”
I said “I’m not sure about that but I can have a good crack at Bohemian Rhapsody”
Employer: Can you perform under pressure?
Me: No, but I can try Bohemian Rhapsody
I went for an interview. They said, “Can you perform under pressure?”
I said “I’m not sure about that but I can have a good crack at Bohemian Rhapsody”
Can you perform under pressure?
No, but I can try Bohemian Rhapsody!
My interviewer asked if I could preform under pressure.
I said no, but I can do a good Bohemian Rhapsody
Interviewer: Can you perform under pressure?
No, but I can give Bohemian Rhapsody a go.
Job Interview : "How do you perform under pressure"
I usually have my band with me
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