Then I can finally be a Billy-on-air.
A blue tooth speaker.
“Because she has no taste.”
The rest were not E
And inside she finds a deed to an undeveloped plot of land that is zoned residential. Disappointed, she sets the deed down and says, "I don't want a lot for Christmas!"
They're too knotty.
It's a gift.
And things got a little tense.
Nothing, it's on the house.
A broken drum kit.
Nobody can beat that....
Can't wait to see their faces when they realize they have a puppy.
It’s a gift.
So I started doing my best human beatbox impersonation.
"Yo! Yo! Presents in da hizzzzzzz!"
She wasn't as amused as I was.
I can't wait to rub it in
The mortician asked the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out the man looks good in the black suit he’s already wearing. The widow however said she thought her husband always looked his best in blue, and she would really like him in a blue suit. She then hands the mortician a blank cheque and says “I don’t care how much it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.” The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe. Remarkably, the suit fit him perfectly. She says to the mortician, “whatever this costs I’m very satisfied, you did an excellent job and I’m incredibly grateful. How much did you spend?” To her astonishment the mortician presents her with her blank cheque, and he says “there’s no charge.” Shocked she replies “no really, I feel like i must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit.” “Honestly ma’am”, the mortician says, “it costs nothing, you see a diseased gentleman about your husbands size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday. He was wearing an attractive blue suit. So I asked his wife if she minded if her husband went to the grave wearing black. She had said it made no difference so long as he looked nice. So from that point on it was really just a matter of switching the heads.”
With a frown, she says "I don't want a lot for Christmas".
....based on what their parents income is.
Because they are in the noughties list.
A monk goes into pizza shop and says “Can you make me one with everything”
Cop: But you are the lawyer? Me: Then where’s my present?
He was absolutely delighted.
A broken drum, you just can’t beat it!
...it was tense.
Things got a little tense.
A broken drum — you can’t beat it!
It’s a gift.
.....based on what their parents income is.
It was tense
Me: So where’s my present?!
Things got a little tense