Penalty Puns

It was, after all, a Capitol offense.

Because they always award against professional fowls.

Apparently he was suspected of fowl play.

Fine.

My dad looked at me and said “I think your player went to Boarding School.”

I'm not happy with the execution.

He needed time to thaw out.

I told him to chill and he said "I AM CHILL" so I yelled back "I THOUGHT YOU WERE DAD".. That's right.. I dad joked my dad

Two mothers-in-law!

Its execution

She had con-troll issues.

He’s always ruffing.

I was two tents.

It's a 15 yard penalty and automatic 1st down.

Sixteen: Four better, four worse, four richer, four poorer.

It would be a little hard to play with everyone getting penalties, since people with corona-virus love to travel

Clown asks: "What do you call someone posing as a fake Italian chef? An im-pasta"

Man doesn't laugh

Clown asks: "What do you get when you cross a tiger and a bear? A tiger and a bear seeking revenge."

No response

Clown asks: "Which super hero asks the most questions? Wonder Woman"

Nothing

Clown asks: "Have you heard of the baseball team the Chicago Hot Dogs? They are the wurst"

Doesn't crack a smile

Clown asks: "Why was the alcoholic so annoying? He wined too much"

Clown starts to get nervous

Clown asks: "The disinterested hockey player got a penalty. What was it? Boarding"

Blank look

Clown asks: "What is a nun's favorite card game? Old Maid"

Yawn

Clown asks: "How do crustaceans celebrate birthdays? With crab cakes"

Annoyed

Clown asks: "What do you call a champion deer? A Win-doe"

grasping at straws

Finally Clown asks: "How do sheep sleep when they have nightmares? Baaaaadly"

He never laughs. Clown gives him his $100 and asks "Did any of my jokes make you laugh?"

Man says "No pun-in-ten-did"

But the truth is, he puts the Steelers at risk of getting penalties all game long...

...Because on every play...

There's fowl on the field.

And given the deaf penalty

I live on the edge of a golf course, and someone’s golf ball landed in our yard, so I grabbed it, ran over to the fairway before they got there and tossed it on. I saved them a penalty stroke!

With a penalty hootout.

My wife and I were visiting family last week, and with my wife's older sister and 7-year-younger brother, he was asking us about forest fires. Discussing having a fire pit in your backyard during a fire ban:

younger brother: What's the penalty for starting a forest fire, like, if there's a ban?

wife: firing squad

me: =D

everyone else: ಠ_ಠ

For fowl play.

For fowl play.

But I have a problem with the execution.