At dinner tonight, I made the greatest original pun I’ve ever heard and it went unappreciated.

My dad almost choked on a small flake of pizza crust, and he spent several minutes coughing in a loud and alarming way.

Finally he stopped, and he was all better. Someone caused him to chuckle, which triggered another fit of coughing.

I said... β€œThat definitely didn’t go well; I think he had a β€˜re-laughse’!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iFunny_Migrant
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2018
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My six-year-old daughter just delighted me with a completely original pun: What do you call it when you have to go inside at the end of the day?

Funset!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bold0perator
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2015
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I'm really upset about the lack of original puns here...

Like seriously, if I've read one, I've reddit all.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBlackestLotus
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2016
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Original puns

Poetry is good for amateurs; literature is best left to prose.

I've somehow made a hobby of creating (often very nerdy) puns, wordplay, and absurdities. Some of them have been sold on t-shirts. Most of them just end up as a FB status. They are not (at) all great, but they are original, so far as I know. Now I'm going to leave them here.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/briandherbert
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2014
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I have started a Pun-Based Youtube Channel! Comprised of Mostly my own Original Puns! youtube.com/watch?v=DmI_P…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TazerLad
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2014
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Blog of original puns n stuff punflowr.tumblr.com/
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Conduit1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2014
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Stop basting my Lamb, you lamb-baster

So I came across a word today in my reading that I had heard before and was able to deduce it's likely meaning based in the context it was used, however, to be safe, I looked it up anyway and while reading the book definition came up with what I hope is an original pun (phrase)...

Context: When someone is giving you a hard time you can say, "stop basting my Lamb, you lamb-baster"

lambaste - criticize (someone or something) harshly

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Textipulator
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2019
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My friend and I have this game we play...

If someone makes a pun, you have to reply in a pun... but it has to be on the same topic as the original pun. Sooooooooooooooooooo my friend had the most clever, best pun of all time... A 3 word combo. The topic was dairy... and he made a pun I didn't quite catch... so with his wit, he responded "I guess that one flew right pasteurize" My mind was shattered...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nazathan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2013
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Dad joke escalation

Dad was visiting last week, talking about his household projects he did. He mentioned that he got his septic tank emptied before winter, and that 'it was a shitty job'. He then tells me that his neighbor also had to get his tank emptied, so the service truck also emptied the neighbor's tank at the same time. He smiles and says, "Well, my neighbor and I finally got our shit together!"

He said he was very proud of himself for making an original pun like that. I patted him on the shoulder, looked him in the eye and said, "I can always appreciate an organic pun."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fish-Dead
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2016
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Originally posted by u/UnidentifiedSpecie
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SilentBlackout_
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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Cake day original joke! Why don’t penguins like eating clown fish?

Because they taste funny!

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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'Tis the season for original content :^)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlipBleepBloop00
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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Thought this pun was original. It is not.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/somenerdnamedtom
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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Did you know Tristan was originally a nickname?

People were sick of having to write out Stanstanstan.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/diatonicnerds
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
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Don’t know how to properly share with this but I have included the name of the original, most people didn’t get it(third line)
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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Did you know the PS5 was originally going to be called the PSPSPSPSPS.

But it was attracting cats too much.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/potatomaster_72
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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I made a joke saying this Thanksgiving would be extra special because we'll be spreading around diseases like the original Thanksgiving. Someone told me "too soon".

They were right. I should have waited until next week.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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Original: Blursed_Wow
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ayushvrma
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
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Did you know french fries aren’t originally from France?

They were first cooked in Greece.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/awag80
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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Our company
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sobie02
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
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My mom says my dad was of Persian origin.

Ee-ran away when I was a child.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wasprobot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
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Red Barron Originally Planed To Incorporate an Amelia Earhart Line Of Pizzas Into Their Brand.

But didn't because they felt no one would be able to find them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoManner8265
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
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Did you hear about the blind carpenter?

He picked up the hammer and saw.

(my dad told this all the time. I am continuing on with the tradition...)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SimplisticAnswer
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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Callmecarson origins
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fieldsofglory-MP
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2020
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I wasn't originally planning to get a brain transplant

But then I changed my mind

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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Historians have traced the origins of flatulence jokes to ancient egypt

It turns out they all have a toot in common

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DargeBaVarder
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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When the original drummer of the Beatles left the band...

All Best were off

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πŸ‘€︎ u/behold_the_man
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
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The man who invented the umbrella was originally gonna call it "brella"

But then he hesitated

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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsa_sharptooth
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
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Conspiracy theorists will never be able to find the true story of the coronavirus' origins...

It was all COVID up

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πŸ‘€︎ u/msboogers
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
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I recently decided to learn sign language...

So that I can tell jokes nobody has ever heard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sgt-Cowboy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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Three things Christ promises he will never do: Won't leave you broken-hearted (Psalm 147:3), won't reject you (John 6:37), and won't leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5).

In essence, Jesus is never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BillyBob_TX
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
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Why does the Norwegian navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they get back to port, they can Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDisneyDork
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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This is a repost because I couldn’t crosspost. The original poster was u/Teambrokeoff
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πŸ‘€︎ u/XxSpiderRebelxX
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
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I put original copies of "The Fall of the House of Usher", "The Murders in the Rue Morgue", "The Pit and the Pendulum" and "The Tell-Tale Heart" on credit hoping to pay them off slowly. Unfortunately, I couldn't make all payments...

He re-Poe-ed them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
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Why do police get to riots early?

To beat the crowd.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/srivapal
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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I got consent from the artist to post this here. Source in cowments.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lukub5
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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A nice rabbit hole to go into.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Leon08x
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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Ever have your kid come up with a better punchline than your original?

I went to ask my daughter:

Where do you park when you visit the moon?

(Originally I was gonna say at the parking meteor!)

But straight faced she replies:

Anywhere you can find space.

Then she grinned... (she knew what she was doing)... space dad. get it? in space....

Totally out dad joked by my own daughter.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/leyline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
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I heard Giuliani dyed?

It leaked a few days ago.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Beard_on
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
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At an auction, I bought an old Nintendo game originally used by Queen Elizabeth.

Now I know how to properly use the royal wii.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
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If you're into gaming history, then you must play on the classic consoles,

it's NESessary

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Magnificent-Moe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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Originally Posted by u/thepandabro on r/technicallythetruth
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vivalasvegas614
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
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I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant...

...but then I changed my mind.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TopDawg117
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
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I wasn't originally planning on getting a brain transplant

But then I changed my mind

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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The man who invented the umbrella was originally going to call it the β€œBrella”

But then he hesitated.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shadynasty94
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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