Thereโ€™s a new drug going around that is nicknamed โ€œangleโ€. My friends want to try it with me, but I took a D.A.R.E. course and donโ€™t want to do drugs, so my friends make fun of me.

I guess Iโ€™m just too square to try angle.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/PopTarnekPop
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 17 2020
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Showerthought: The Hugo Award could be nicknamed The Pew-Pewlitzer.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Lunar-Modular
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 05 2020
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Drugs should be nicknamed 'ladder...'

...because the more there is of it, the higher you can get!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 10
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/baconsalts
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 16 2019
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My friend is an unemployed circus clown. I nicknamed him Pennywise . . .

His career is in the gutter.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/boogerknows
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 03 2019
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At work, we have a printer nicknamed Bob Marley

It's always jammin

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 13
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thakurfrommountains
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 03 2019
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Robert hated his nickname and longed to be discombobulated.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/CatsCreepMeowt
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 27 2021
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Did you know Tristan was originally a nickname?

People were sick of having to write out Stanstanstan.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 124
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/diatonicnerds
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 24 2020
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My coworkers gave me the nickname Mr. Compromise.

It wasnโ€™t my first choice, but Iโ€™m okay with it.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 24
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 15 2020
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If I ever go to jail I am making sure I get the nickname โ€˜mitochondriaโ€™

The powerhouse of the cell

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 130
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Haas19
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 13 2020
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I gave my wife a nickname and it's "Candy"

She thinks it's sweet

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Slymood
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 05 2020
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My wife said my new nickname is Shroom

Because I am such a FunGi...๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/SambuelAnacapri
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 05 2020
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My nickname in the adult film industry used to be Tri-Pod..

I was the best camera man they ever had.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 13
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/BeastWhiteKid
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 14 2020
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Wade Wilson changed profession and got a new nickname:

He is now the taxidriver known as Carpool.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/midy-dk
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 11 2020
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What do you call a mnemonic made to remember someone's nickname?

'Name'o'Nick'

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/obiwan_66
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 21 2020
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"Do you have any nicknames, Tom?"

I said, "Well, there's Nicholas...Nicky..."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/TommehBoi
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 04 2020
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US native bees have a nickname..

USB

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/MadOldLogan
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 28 2020
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Nicknames that make your name longer should be called

Nicholasnames

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 29
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Chath
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 10 2020
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Mitochondria would be a great prison nickname.

They'd be the powerhouse of the cell.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 10k
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/lazztronica
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 22 2018
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My buddy Neil decided to get into a new kind of business designing keyholes for small houses

So we gave him the nickname shack keyhole Neil

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Runningforbeer343
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 12 2021
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In college my nickname was safe cracker.

Not because I was good at cracking safes but because I was a non-threatening white guy.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 26
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Doctorofnonscience
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 09 2020
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Potential nickname for Ellen
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 33
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Sheepherder226
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 23 2019
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My friend Peter keeps saying the same things over again.

So I nicknamed him Re-Peter.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/DENelson83
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 20 2020
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Do you know what Osama Bin Laden's nickname was?

Ben

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ZZEZ73
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 16 2019
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My wife was really disappointed when she found out the reason why my nickname in college was โ€œThe Love Machine.โ€

Itโ€™s because I sucked at tennis.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 17
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 28 2019
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- whatโ€™s your name?
  • nick
  • what is it short for?
  • Nickname.
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/axaxamasha
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 20 2020
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I named my daughter "Amanda Victoria" but i dont really want her to have a nickname.

Unfortunately i think it might be Manda tory

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/zombiepipes
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 03 2019
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I turn 21 in In 38 minutes and my nickname with my friends is โ€œpickleโ€ so how do I spend my birthday?

Well I โ€œRelishโ€ the moment obviously

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/TheTexican11
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 16 2019
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When Edgar Allan Poe was growing up, his nickname was Bohemian Rhapsody

he's just a Poe boy from a Poe family

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/wawoodworth
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 18 2019
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The greatest baseball player ever was a guy named Hugh McBealy, and he was most famous for every single time he came to the plate knocking the ball high over right field and into the stands.

He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.

He earned the nickname โ€œthe machineโ€ for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.

And the day he retired a reporter asked him โ€œHow does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?โ€

Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€ He said.

The reporter clarified โ€œliterally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!โ€

Hugh looked dejected and disappointed โ€œyeah, my greatest failure...โ€

โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€ Said the reporter incredulously.

Hugh letโ€™s out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.

โ€œIโ€™ve been aiming left this whole timeโ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Frnklfrwsr
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 12 2020
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A nickname for money is "bread" because

when I'm kneading it there never is enough dough

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 29
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/CMMIV
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 02 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My nickname for my wife is โ€œhinge.

Because she is something to adore.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 53
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/scorchedgoat
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 04 2018
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At WORK we have a PRINTER we've nicknamed BOB MARLEY.

He's always JAMMIN'.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 15
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/RayDosson
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 09 2018
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At work we have a printer we've nicknamed Bob Marley.

It's always Jammin'.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 26
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/alphamannen
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 23 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
At work we have a printer we've nicknamed Bob Marley

This is due to the fact that it's always jammin'

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 25
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Elroe
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 24 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My colleagues at work gave me the nickname โ€œMr. Compromiseโ€.

It wasnโ€™t my first choice, but Iโ€™m ok with it.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 512
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My nickname at work is Mr. Compromise.

It wasnโ€™t my first choice, but Iโ€™m okay with it.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 280
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 19 2020
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My colleagues at work have given me the nickname โ€œMr. Compromise.โ€

Itโ€™s not my first choice, but Iโ€™m ok with it.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 10k
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 10 2019
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At the office, the nickname that my coworkers gave me is โ€˜Mr. Compromiseโ€.

It isnโ€™t my first choice, but I can live with it.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 19
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 10 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
At work, my colleagues have given me the nickname "Mr. Compromise."

It wasn't my first choice, but I'm ok with it.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/simplyGagi
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 13 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My wife was devastated when she found what that my nickname in college was โ€œThe Love Machine.โ€

Because I sucked at tennis.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report

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