Legendary
A Percentaur!
Because they have gnome mercy.
But everything I come up with is too unicorny.
I heard it was Legend Dairy.
The scentaur.
thus making him the Centaur for Disease Control.
The Centaur of Attention
A sentient centaur centurion centenial cent center.
Hannibal Lecturer 💀
Legend dairy
Lebriechauns
Personally, I think the lecture was starting to drag on
It's Star Trek: The Search for Spork
Pega-sus.
Hey. Don't say Je's-looking-Sus bro
After the visit, he stand corrected.
Achoopacabra
...The Redone D'ant.
It's a creature the size of an ant. But it has the head of an ant, the body of an ant, and the legs of another ant. It's half ant, half other ant.
The Menopausus
I regret nothing :p
Miso-Genie.
I started running a few weeks ago and since my dad is one of my biggest supporters, I had to tell him about my progress when he called today:
Me: "So, I went for my longest run yet, today. I feel fine now, but I'll probably be mighty sore tomorrow."
Dad: "You'll be a Norse god tomorrow?"
Me: ?????
Dad: "Mighty Thor."
dad laughter ensues
Thanks for the silver, kind stranger!
(why can't mythical creatures be weak to platinum?)
Since its a big, it was touching the ground my whole time. I turn to my wife and say "Did you know T-Rex are mythical beasts? See it's a draggin'"
For reference: Link to wiki
Some of these are done in a kind of "news headline"-style:
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Choir leader fired after using too much sexual innuendo; "Lewd Ex Cantor."
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Video on demand about a street where nothing happens; "Vod of the Boring Alley."
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Man's brutal cousin turns out to be a great bloke; "Raw-Ted, Great Dude".
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Panic spreads as toilet facilities take over the world; "Cry! Stall-Age."
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A man orders a book of basic letters to look after his daughters belongings while he looks after the others; "ABC, Watch Her's!".
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Sams brother cheats a dude; "Dean Cons the Peep."
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A ride in the amusement park offers a wide range of emotions; "High! Low! Woo! Nah."
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A weird and hard to describe new dessert; "Cold Lemon Thing."
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A new star in stand up rises! Come see "Puntiff Sulyvahn."
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Pirates start eating fava beans and a new drink is required; "Yo! Ho! The Chianti!."
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A Long lived man has an unusual apetite for fish; "Old-Rick, Devourer of Cods".
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In Bacteria-Town, a devastating disease strikes one inhabitant working at a hotel; "Cancer of the Borrelia Valet".
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Roman god Cubid is ordered to take a woman to cave and kill her; "Drag and Slay Her Amor"
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Osiris's statue has been in way too many marriages and people have started to call it; "Osiris the Consummated Thing."
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The choir leader from before is transformed into a mushroom; "Champignon Cantor"
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An english man becomes the leader of a Polish airplane company and gets nicknamed; "LOT-Rick"
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An impatient tree person attacks a random mythical hunter; "Antsy Ent! Why Hern?!"
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Horse named Elvis keeps making noise and a man shouts;"Neigh Less King!"
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A child opens a chocolate egg and a white spirit jumps out; "Soul of Kinder"
Sorry about the possible typos.
My dad supplies the swords and weaponry to medieval times.
Dad:This day is just like a very large, magical and mythical reptile.
Me: How so
Dad: It's a dragon
Even though we've been out of college for years, my fraternity pledge son and I still get together every week to play some pool. This week, we were discussing werewolves and where they fit in the mythical creature hierarchy.
"Werewolves are obviously the best," he says.
"That makes sense you'd like them," I reply. "You're like halfway one already."
"Oh, is it because of this?" he asks, gesturing toward his hair, his beard, his hairy chest.
"No, cause you're a human when the moon's not full."
It was legend dairy.
