When a Muslim dies, they meet their Mecca.
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a drunken Muslim?

Mohammered.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nearly-God
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is the English weather like a Muslim (not racist)

Because its either sunni or shi'ite

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sentinel_UK
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Thought I heard someone say β€œHello” in Arabic

But it was a false Salaam.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Plumsby
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
How does a Muslim close the door?

Islams it

πŸ‘︎ 64
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/33Fanste33
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is Dwayne Johnson's head revered by the Muslim faith?

Because it's the Dome of the Rock.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spudquake
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
How do most Muslims like their eggs?

Sunni side up.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ZeldaFan158
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Ramadan is starting today. To all my Muslim friends who are observing this holy month, I have one thing to say.

Lunch is on me.

πŸ‘︎ 463
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Who does a Muslim ask when he forgets about the greatest Mughal Emperor?

#Allah-Who-Akbar

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/siddharths067
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a 13 year old muslim stuck in self isolation?

A Qur'anteen

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/amethhead
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
🚨︎ report
People say that muslims are very angry

Because of their short fuse.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Wornsy21
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a small Mexican Muslim?

MOSQUITO

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BrotherTausil
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do midget Mexican muslims go to pray?

In the Mosquito

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LongBakunawa
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Snow isn’t a problem in Muslim countries...

... but ISIS

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wedgewizard
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What do Muslims do during the coronavirus outbreak ?

They stay in Quran-tine

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMatrix1101
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report
My Muslim friend starts eating much junk food.

Now he is just Mu.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mighty__Tor
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are the Muslim flies angry at each other?

Cause they're in sects.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report
To all the Muslims out there

Let the hunger games begin

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/deathblade66
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Growing up I went to an all-Muslim school. The teacher asked me to make sure that my classmates weren't sneaking bacon at lunch.

I got a badge and a sash that read, "Halal Monitor"

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/unklethan
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do you put a Muslim with Coronavirus?

In Qur'antine!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hatpar
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
🚨︎ report
what do you call a muslim pop band ?

quran quran

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bigheadedshrimp
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2019
🚨︎ report
I heard some Muslims in Ecuador got malaria

They were bitten by mosque-Quitos

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PopeShashcan49
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My Muslim friend's opticians closed down recently as it wasn't doing well

It was silly of him to call it Asif Eyecare

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Two chinese Christians are having a contest to see who can contact God the fastest. After one wins, the other looks at him and says

"Well prayed"

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JCokeDaKilla
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do Muslim llamas come from?

Alpacastan! ...I'm not sorry.

πŸ‘︎ 81
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SamTMartian
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call Muslim chili peppers?

Halalapenos

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/w00tah
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I know Muslims don’t eat pork.

But Islam ok though?

πŸ‘︎ 138
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2018
🚨︎ report
3 Muslim women walk into Hungry Jacks

One is dressed entirely in bright pink, another neon green, and another in gorgeous gold.

A man ordering food at the counter notices them and asks the employee why they are wearing such bright colours, to which the employee responds:

"The burkas are better at Hungry Jack's"

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kie723
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
A Muslim woman wanted to fuck a gorilla. Her husband objected and said...

"That's Haram, bae."

πŸ‘︎ 261
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/anjelloe
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2016
🚨︎ report
Dad is an older muslim gentleman, I remember this from when he was in the hospital a few years ago.

Nurse: "Your doctor should return in just a few moments with your test results."

looks at dad

"Oh, we also have a new room for religious practices if you wanted to do some prayers?"

Dad: "God, were my test results that bad?"

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sumito
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2014
🚨︎ report
Why did the Muslim get a speeding ticket during Ramadan?

He was going to fast

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cmon_Just_The_Tip
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2015
🚨︎ report
Whenever my Muslim roommate goes for prayer, I sit down next to him with some apple pie and ice cream.

So that both of us are in A la mode.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do most muslimes live? In Allahbama.

I am just joking guys. They all live in Guantallahmo.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Marv1236
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2019
🚨︎ report
85% of Muslims prefer their eggs Sunni side up.
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gluecksschwuemmli
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
How does a Muslim close a door?

Islams it

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ryanxdxdxd
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
How does a muslim close a door?

Islams it

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AdamNDnD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.