Murmurer Puns

My friend is a math teacher and was talking about a student in her class.

"She asked me if there was such thing as a left triangle!" murmurings and laughter from the rest of the group Me: "Well, you guys are the dumb ones. Of COURSE there is such thing!" confused looks Me: "If you have two triangles and take one away, the one that remains is left!"

eyerolls and groans

I'm proud.

A lot of Hungarians and a few Romans lining up with me (alone) at the terminal. I can hear that they speak English, they're all murmuring to each other. At the last second our terminal gets changed and we have to leave the airplane we were lined up to board behind. Instead we walk down another terminal that leads to some stairs that leads onto a bus.

We all pack in, I'm positioned somewhere in the middle of the masses when I announce "This is a funny looking airplane!"

EVERYONE looks at me. Not a smile. Not a smirk. Nothing.

I crack up laughing at how funny I am.

So as the hairdresser was walking past a school boy he caught his foot on the guys rucksack and nearly tripped.

I murmured "That was a close shave."

The school boy looked at me, looked away and started to shake his head, while me and the hairdresser are grinning away...