BREAKING: The United States, after mistaking it for an Iranian submarine, has struck a utility submarine with an underwater torpedo that was en route to displace the shipping carrier blocking the Suez Canal, killing all 169 aboard

whoops wrong sub

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeterPorky
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2021
🚨︎ report
Ducks love raw potatoes and will attempt to unearth them with their bill. Enthusiastically mistaking rocks for potatoes can cause damage leaving them...

debillatated

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stroger
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
🚨︎ report
A pretty easy mistake to make!
πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shallelujah
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
🚨︎ report
I made the mistake of having a beer while doing my calculus homework last night...

I got in trouble for drinking and deriving.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/leparr
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2021
🚨︎ report
I try to learn from my mistakes,

but it's hard when they can't even wipe their own bum.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/greedydita
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2021
🚨︎ report
I told my wife to embrace her mistakes

So she gave me a hug!!!

πŸ‘︎ 142
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
🚨︎ report
The spelling mistake adze nothing.
πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you know dolphins never make mistakes?

They do everything on porpoise.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine made a terrible mistake at work.

When he came in the next day, his face was purple. His co-workers told him he shouldn’t beet himself up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jester57
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
🚨︎ report
My whole life I thought Chewbacca was an Ewok....

Wookie mistake.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Fun fact: Every dictionary has at least 1 mistake in it!

In the M section, right after mist.

Thanks HAI

πŸ‘︎ 231
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashers132
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Made a mistake of asking for a cappuccino in Bali.
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Won_dream
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2021
🚨︎ report
I told my wife that she should embrace her mistakes.

Then she smiled and hugged me tightly.

πŸ‘︎ 327
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chihiro_yoru
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Honest LPT: I got embarrassed the other day, and want to help other people avoid making my mistake. Now this might seem counterintuitive, but if you come up with a good dad joke MEMORIZD it and NEVER write it down. Because the moment you put it on paper...

It becomes tearable

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Love_and_Poop
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
🚨︎ report
I think we made a mistake when we started calling childbirth β€œdelivery”.

It should have been called takeout instead.

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
🚨︎ report
I learn from the mistakes of people...

....who have taken my advice.

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2021
🚨︎ report
A grave mistake
πŸ‘︎ 210
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bloodywolfeyes
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Engineers don't make mistakes...

they make revisions

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
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My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm, and by mistake I gave her a tube of Super Glue.

It’s been a week now and she’s still not talking to me.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joachim_s
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
An architect designed a bridge but he made a massive mistake.

He couldn’t get over it.

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lum1nar
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Learn from your parents mistakes....

Use birth control.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
I packed my tent but there was a mistake
πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jrexthrilla
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I killed my friend. I thought he was a vampire.

It was a mistake.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/billbixbyakahulk
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2021
🚨︎ report
They made a mistake on the statue of Lincoln.

It was a monumental error

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UncleFuckingIroh
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine a form of public transportation where there is no monetary fee but you relive past mistakes for as long as you are a passenger
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/C0LL3CT
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a typo in a magic spell

A Spelling mistake

πŸ‘︎ 164
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Froztvyte
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a typo on a headstone?

A grave mistake.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sheikh_potato
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A pirate wanted to celebrate his captain’s birthday, so he bought a large quantity of balloons while ashore. Back on the ship, he walked over to hand the balloons to the captain, but he tripped and most of them floated away. The captain said, β€œArrr! That was a costly mistake...”

β€œWe lost a lot of doubloons.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Unfussed
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I almost made a huge mistake applying to Rice University.

I'm really a meat and potatoes kind of guy.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jdmpersson
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my dad if he ever learns from his mistakes

"Sure", he said, "I got a vasectomy the day after you were born".

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PygmeePony
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I told my son people keep accidentally pleading for me to purchase meat for them. He asked, β€œBy mistake?”

I shouted, β€œOh come on! Not you too!”

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I put ketchup in my eyes

in heinzsight, it was a very bad mistake

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Major_Cupcake
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
🚨︎ report
When people misspell barely like barley, they’re not making a mistake

They’re just going against the grain

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
This guy wanted to find me to fight , he made a mistake and after i sent him this, he blocked me reddit.com/gallery/hy8fa6
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/adam10boy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
🚨︎ report
LPT: If you don't want to buy sandwiches to your co-workers, just buy them with mistakes: Other kind of bread, other size...

Sorry, wrong sub

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Potato23860
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What are Astronauts doing when they do a mistake?

They « Apollo »gize

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maduch1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
A man that makes a mistake in an elevator,

is wrong on many levels

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mystichunterz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I often make mistakes telling Dad jokes.

I guess I'm a faux pas.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Apollonius_Cone
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
One time Chewbacca forgot to release the emergency brake before flying the millennium falcon

It was a wookie mistake

πŸ‘︎ 121
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheHamstoner
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2021
🚨︎ report
I was always told to we should celebrate our mistakes

I guess that's why my mum throws me a birthday party every year

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Putting up the wrong headstone is a grave mistake

Epitaphs never written:

I never thought I'd live to see this day come

Here lies a great photographer, he died from overexposure

She wrote a best selling book
- Paige Turner

Here lies Claire Voyant
She never saw it coming...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/techtornado
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Wich dentist makes the most mistakes

Incidentist

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kaasballetje95
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A tearrible mistake
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πŸ‘€︎ u/punteas
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I made the mistake of telling my suitcase that we won’t be going anywhere this year because of the pandemic.

I’m having to put up with a lot of emotional baggage ever since.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chocolava
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes...

she gave me a hug

πŸ‘︎ 93
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iNeedHealing24_7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
🚨︎ report
I told my wife to embrace her mistakes...

then she hugged me.

πŸ‘︎ 184
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πŸ‘€︎ u/growupyall
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I think it was a mistake to call childbirth β€œdelivery”.

It should have been called takeout instead.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Dolphins never make mistakes

Everything they do is on porpoise

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/alphaleo00x
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report

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