Maryland Puns

Your Old Bay

Im told no one was killed.....but many suffered from soft tissue damage.

Annapolis

As part of a school assignment about the 13 American colonies, my son was supposed to create a travel slogan for one of them. I suggested "Maryland: How Do You Like Them Annapolis?" I thought it was better than he and my wife acted.

Probably because everyone knows where the Big Apple is, but not where the Minneapolis.

Old Bae.

I said "That's easy, you're already a Maryland man's son."

So I'm visiting my dad in Maryland with my fiancé. We're all in the car driving while discussing Altoids.

Dad: "Altoids are delicious!"

Fiancé: "No they're not, they make my stomach hurt. You're wrong."

Dad: "I'm never wrong. One time, I thought I was wrong, but I was wrong."

Good one, dad.

News: "Larry Hogan was sworn in today as the 62nd Governor of Maryland..."

Mom: "So he was only governor for one minute."

Such pun. Much groan. Wow.

I've moved to London 2 years ago and he is still in Maryland. This was our google chat exchange just now:

Friend: Some days I miss you more than others. Today is one of those days :(

Me: awwwww... i miss you 100% every day

Friend: Is your aim that bad?

We were eating dinner at a local crab restaurant in Maryland when the baby at the table next to us started crying. My 8 year old looked at me and asked "daddy, do you think that baby is crabby?"

Son: Dad! I got a new jersey, and it's actually school colors!

Me: Cool! Maybe you can get a maryland or delaware in school colors too!

Son: ... disgusted sigh

And yes, I cracked up laughing like a madman!

No, but an apple is :)