http://imgur.com/p8zGyin
"Do you think I could pull off that mustache."
"Nope. I think it is probably real."
It's my magnum opium
I could finally say I have a magnum dong
Exponential DK
It's an Autobotography.
My kids didn't think it was funny. Thought you guys might get a good groan out of it.
So my dad and I went to a baseball game and during the game he turns and asks, "Son, how many people do you think can fit in this stadium?" When I began to think about it, he gave me this look and then cheekily says, "I just want a ballpark estimate".
He thinks this is his magnum opus dad joke.
It'll be my Magnum O'Puss.
Me and this girl I'm seeing were walking around the mall and we decided to go to Hot Topic to kill time. Walking around we saw some car fresheners with band logos on them and my gf picks one up and says "hmm I wonder what Nirvana smells like?"
Without hesitation I answer "Teen Spirit"
It was the most perfect joke set up ever and I don't think I'll ever top it. It was my magnum opus. I don't think she appreciated it as much as I did.
We were talking about how Tom Selleck was originally offerered to play Indiana Jones.
Friend: He turned down the role because he was working on Magnum PI
Me: He also turned down the 'roll' because he didn't want to get too full before dinner.
We were talking about how Tom Selleck was originally offerered to play Indiana Jones.
Friend: He turned down the role because he was working on Magnum PI
Me: He also turned down the 'roll' because he didn't want to get too full before dinner.
