My wife got mad at me because I wouldnโ€™t stop singing โ€œIโ€™m a Believerโ€ by the Monkees. At first, I thought she was kidding.

But then I saw her face.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DiosMioMan2
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
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My wife got really mad when I told her she had no sense of direction

She packed up her bags and right.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
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I once debated a flat earther. He got so mad he stormed off saying he would walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong.

Heโ€™ll come around eventually.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/LinkIsThicc
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
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I asked my friend to stop making Harry Potter puns and she got really mad

'Siriusly?' she said, 'what is Ron with you?'

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Irishblackfish
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Was Spartacus mad because the Lion ate his wife?

No. He was gladiator.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 59
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Texgymratdad
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 24 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My Christian wife got mad at me because adultery is a sin

But by god did I love thy neighbor

๐Ÿ‘︎ 33
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Purple_ferret1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife got mad at me when I spilled wine on the window

It was stained glass

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/AtomicWaffle-117
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 09 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just told my neighbor, Mr. Claimer he was ugly, but not to get mad.

it was my disclaimer.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/buckeyespud
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 08 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The mad scientist awoke, thrilled to see his clone right next to him.

He was beside himself with excitement.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 45
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Joesdad65
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wifeโ€™s mad at me because she said I never buy her flowers

I honestly didnโ€™t even know she sold flowers

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/pawpaw69420
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
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Mad house
๐Ÿ‘︎ 51
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MaryOverMatter
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why was the cow mad at the bull

Cause they have beef

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Forgotten_Orokin
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude.

I personally am on the fence

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Yarnell3131
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
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Well I mean I would be mad...
๐Ÿ‘︎ 11k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/xxDr-Beckyxx
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
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Somewhere a cat is mad at me
๐Ÿ‘︎ 46
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Ha-Ka-Tu
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy

It's not like I did something

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Sash_Mystq
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
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Hook is mad
๐Ÿ‘︎ 4k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Kelly240361
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
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The creator of Mad Libs passed away

His friends described him as a round and pulpy man who loved his wife and penguins. He will be deeply pooped.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 31
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Imnotarobot12764
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If you are offended by my dad jokes, donโ€™t get mad and ask me to go to the artificial excavation filled with water.

I mean well.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/PaulFromTheParty
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Don't be mad at lazy people

They didn't do anything

๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/araitisaname
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
When people get mad about me playing League of Legends I just

LOL.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/squarezloader
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call it when all the cows the dairy farm go mad?

Udder Chaos

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jwaldrip
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
After my wife had a stressful day at work, I drew her bath. She then got mad at me!!

Some people are so ungrateful. I used an entire pencil adding details to it and everything :(


[Just thought of this. I'm pretty happy with myself right now.]

๐Ÿ‘︎ 36
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/zipflop
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a pirate who's mad because he can't pee?

irate

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ASK_ABOUT_LSD_BOOK
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife got mad after I tried to convince her that she'd agreed to let me buy a neon sign.

I guess she doesn't like gas lighting.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/iron__giant
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I was so mad when Walmart ran out of figurines for the Nativity

Now I have to attend manger management

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/NathanielleS
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I have an asian friend who's constantly mad

His name is Fu Ming.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Danieboy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why was the US mad at Canada for remaining part of the commonwealth?

Because being stuck with the land of the Angles is obtuse

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/wnlm
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Don't be mad, be hoppy!
๐Ÿ‘︎ 23
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/WashingYoda
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why was the sniper's girlfriend mad at him?

Because he never misses her.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 20
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Sarmale255
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A man had a fetish for touching and hearing, one day his friend got mad and slapped and yelled at the man

He ended up coming to his senses

๐Ÿ‘︎ 22
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JK-AJ27
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why was the skeleton mad at the grave robber?

Because of all the skulduggery

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SirSunDowner
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
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My wife is really mad at me for throwing a snowball at my son.

On top of it, Iโ€™m banned permanently from the maternity ward.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
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My wife is constantly changing her name, but gets mad at me when I call her the new name.

Sometimes it's hungry, sometimes it's tired, sometimes it's angry. Please help.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Jdabby32
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
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If a midget gets mad...

Do they short circuit?

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/carson0412
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a German who is mad at everything ?

A Sour-Kraut (Sauerkraut)

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DJBlue18
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Iโ€™m mad at my wife because I bought a stun gun for her birthday and she tested it out on me. Twice.

What a revolting response to a gift. I was stunned.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 56
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DestroyatronMk8
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A flat earther was debating me and got so mad he said "I will walk off the edge of the earth to prove you wrong!!"

He'll come around eventually

๐Ÿ‘︎ 47
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/clouc1223
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wifeโ€™s really mad at the fact I have no sense of direction

So I packed up my stuff and right.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/vancity1985
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife is mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction.

So I packed up my stuff and right

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/kiwiboy0419
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction,

So I packed up my stuff and right!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 13
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Krayola-
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife is mad because I never buy her flowers.

I didnโ€™t even know she sold flowers!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 55
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MrVegano
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I once debated a flat earthed. He got me so mad I stormed off, saying I'd come back around eventually.

You could say I went over the edge.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dendari
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife was mad I had a bad sense of direction...

...so I packed up and right!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 15
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife is really mad because I have no sense of direction.

So I packed up my stuff and right.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/deathto2020
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
"My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction."

"So I packed up my stuff and right!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 23
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/PersonWalker
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife is really mad at the fact i have no sence of direction,

So i packed up my stuff and right

๐Ÿ‘︎ 1k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/shamudawhale51
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Don't be mad at lazy people

They didn't do anything

๐Ÿ‘︎ 32
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Degtyrev
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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