Lolium Perenne Puns

I mean, Okay, I understand agriculture and shit, but FUCKING HELL, I NEVER LIKED GRASS, THIS IS HELL. Basically stupid info about 56 types of grass with no question base and no guidance. I'm so fucking tired.

it's like

Name: English Rhyegrass

Latin name: Lolium perenne L.

Base: Loose base

Height: 50cm

Depth of root: 50cm

Flower: Glean type( sorry google translated this)

Characteristics: The mother fucking stem is purple at the base.

Leaf: Length from 15 to 25cm, width 3-4mm eith green color.

LIKE HALF OF THESE ARE FUCKING USELESS GRASSES.

When we bought this suburban home outside of Seattle, it was a boring traditional lawn and the previous owners had used weed n feed and glyphosphate (they left it in the garage)

We bought some herb de lawn blend from PT lawn seed, overseeded with topsoil and now 4 years later, it's finally fully established, beautiful, soft underfoot, and a bee-heaven. https://ptlawnseed.com/products/pt-706-herb-de-lawn

mix is :

Perennial Ryegrass - Lolium perenne Hard Fescue - Festuca trachyphylla Quatro Tetraploid Sheep Fescue - Festuca ovina 'Quatro'White Yarrow - Achillea millefoliumWhite Clover - Trifolium repens Sweet Alyssum - Lobularia maritime Roman Chamomile - Chamaemelum nobile

What we learned:

• too much micro clover chokes out the rest and creates a tangled mess. (I overseeded too much in the start)
• a good blend of fescues and polyculture flowering herbs made it easier to manage, hardier, and drought-resistant.

https://preview.redd.it/faxv497tqd071.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=27eb0d6b8764f84207430954f9f75e8c9779245b

• mow once a month to 5-6 inches but not long enough where the fescue falls.
• overseeding the original grass was fine but took longer for the clover roots to establish about 200sqft.
• a tiny bit of water to establish but now I don't water it at all and my lawn is the greenest on the block

happy to answer any questions you have.

edit: full shot of the front lawn

https://preview.redd.it/euune51rqd071.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f0044930cd600298fd5aab99572c431698c65fc8

A

Abort - A mushroom that for some reason ceases to grow and never reaches maturity.       Acidic - Having a pH lower than 7.        Adnate - Where the gills or tubes under the cap of a fungus are perpendicular to the stipe or stem at the point of attachment        Adnexed - Where the gills or tubes under the cap of a fungus sweep upwards before being attached to the stem        Aerial mycelium - Hyphal elements growing above the agar surface.        Agar - An extract from a seaweed used to solidify media. The agar used in mushrooms cultivation is usually available in powder form        Agaric - A term describing mushrooms and toadstools having gills beneath a cap that is connected to a stipe or stem        Alkaline - Having a pH greater than 7.        Annulus - A ring of tissue left attached to the stem of a mushroom or toadstool when the veil connecting the cap and stem ruptures as the young fruitbody develops. Antibiotic - A class of natural and synthetic compounds that inhibit the growth of or kill other microorganisms.        Ascomycetes - A group of fungi that have in common that they produce their sexual spores inside specialized cells (asci), which usually contain eight spores.Aseptic - Sterile condition: no unwanted organisms present        Aseptic technique - Also sterile technique. Manipulating sterile instruments or culture media in such a way as to maintain sterility.        Autoclave - Basically a big pressure cooker, sometimes operating at higher pressure than 15 PSI, thus achieving sterilization temperatures above 250?F. Axenic - Not contaminated; gnotobiotic: Said esp. of a medium devoid of all living organisms except those of a single Species         B

Bacteria - Unicellular microorganisms that may cause contamination in culture work. Grain spawn is very easily contaminated with bacteria. On the other hand there are some bacteria that are needed for the fruiting of agaricus. These are present in the casing soil.        Basidiomycetes - A group of fungi which produce their spores externally on so called basidia. Often four spores are produced per basidium. Many basidiomycetes show clamp connections on their hyphae, ascomycetes never do. Most mushrooms are classified as basidiomycetes, whereas most molds are ascymycetic.        Basidium (pl. basidia) - A cell that gives rise to a basidiospore. Basidia are characteristic of the basidiomycetes.        Biological efficiency - The definition of biological efficiency (B

Bonjour ! Je n'y connais pas grand-chose en jardinage, et j'aurais besoin d'aide de jardiniers plus expérimentés pour m'aider à choisir le gazon approprié pour ma pelouse.

Un peu de contexte : ma femme et moi avons acheté une maison en Belgique il y a quelques années avec un joli gazon d'herbe fine. Nous avons fait de notre mieux pour l'entretenir et chasser les mauvaises herbes mais, en début d'année passée, nous nous sommes aperçus qu'une partie du terrain était envahi par la mousse. Nous avons réussi à l'arracher avec un scarificateur et nous avons re-semé du gazon.

Par la même occasion, nous avons fait rajouter de la terre sur plusieurs parties du terrain pour l'aplanir, et nous y avons re-semé du gazon également.

C'est là que le problème commence. Nous avons choisi (un peu au hasard, sur base du peu qui était encore disponible en magasin à cette période compliqué de début de COVID) une variété de gazon "spécial ombre", composée de 15% de lolium perenne/ray-grass anglais (15% Chardin), 55% festuca rubra/fétuque rouge (30% Bogart, 25% Hastings) et 15% de festuca ovina/fétuque ovine (30% Quatro).

Malheureusement, ce nouveau gazon a un aspect très différent de l'ancien gazon. Le nouveau gazon qui pousse est d'un vert très clair, pousse très vite et plus haut que l'ancien gazon, et sous forme de "mottes" parsemées séparées par des espaces vides (cela ne se voit pas quand l'herbe est longue, mais c'est très laid quand elle est tondue, voir photo #1 "aérienne") au lieu de bien recouvrir le sol, et pousse très "dru" quand elle est courte. Le résultat n'est pas très beau ni très agréable sous les pieds.

J'aimerais profiter de ce printemps pour re-semer un gazon plus similaire à l'ancien, c'est-à-dire qui pousse moins haut, moins vite, d'un vert un peu plus foncé, et surtout, qui recouvre bien la totalité du sol au lieu de pousser en mottes denses séparées de vide.

Pour cela, j'aimerais être sûr de choisir la bonne variété de gazon. Les informations que j'en trouve en ligne sur le sujet sont malheureusement contradictoires/peu claires.

Pouvez-vous m'aider à identifier les variétés de gazon que j'ai actuellement dans mon jardin ?

J'ai pris quelques images : https://imgur.com/a/z5xbY2P

• Les photos #2, #3 et #4 montrent le "nouveau" gazon que je n'aime pas, qui pousse en "mottes" et qui a une base violacée ou brune.
• Les photos #5 à #8 montrent des gazons que j'aime bien. J'aimerais si possible re-semer le mê

Do your worst!

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

When I got home, they were still there.

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

It really does, I swear!

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Bob

So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."

Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.

Just to clarify, 12345678

Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...

Notices there's only 2;

Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."

I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.

I was just sitting there doing nothing.

“BOOM”?!

"That's what they're fighting about."