Ismaili Puns

What are your thoughts regarding this?

Ya Ali Madad. I’m a student who is currently studying at George Mason University and was wondering if there are any Ismailis that go there as well. This might be a little weird to post, however this is my second year (first year on campus) and am trying to find people that are Ismailis as well.

Its always felt very weird to me-Ismailism and Twelver Shi'ism (the group most people today mean when they say "Shia Islam") are two different denominations with two different lines of Imams and two different theologies-not quite as different from each other as they are from Sunni Islam, but close. In RL, its debated among historians whether the Qara Qoyunlu were (Twelver) Shia or Sunni, but I've never seen any suggestion outside of Paradox that they were Ismaili. And the ironic part is that the game gets the placement of Twelver Shi'ism and Zaydi Shi'ism roughly correct-before placing Ismailis where, AFAIK, they historically weren't. Was it just done for balance, or is there a source I haven't read. (And yes, Persian and Middle Eastern history is a hobby of mine, so this bugs me probably more than it would most people.)

Want some food? Nah we don't donate that to the homeless. In Khudawand Mawlana Hazir Imam's home we auction it and the highest bidder gets to keep the food. The food is now considered blessed by Mawla and somehow he is pleased with the offering. Give money, get Mawla's esoteric blessings and enjoy nice South Asian food.

Want Mawla's esoteric blessings? It is auctioned during prayers. Highest bidder wins, goes to the money collectors, inserts the cash in the golden bowl and receive Mawla Khudawand's esoteric blessings.

Need forgiveness? Give money, get Mawla's esoteric blessings

Want to drink water with Mawla's noor and have a sweet? Insert money in golden bowl and bam you can drink from Mawla's noor!

Something bad happened to you or your family? Give money, get Mawla's esoteric blessings

Want to join a special congregation for special blessings or "majalis"? Give money, get Mawla's esoteric blessings and be blessed for paying a lot of money for the special congregation. Wear fancy thousand dollar suit on that day and come to Jamatkhana with your Tesla. Women wear expensive sarees. Perfect day for rich people to hangout together and worship their beloved Mawlana Khudawand Aga Khan

Going through depression or illness? Give money, get Mawla's esoteric blessings.

Need to do well on exam or are praying for success? Give money, get Mawla's esoteric blessings

Someone in your family passes away? Give money, get Mawla's esoteric blessings AND also pay for a burial plan when you are alive.

Want some milk or fruit? Nah you don't keep the milk nor does it go to the homeless. But it is auctioned and the highest bidder receives special esoteric blessings from Mawlana Hazar Imam.

Would someone who only recognizes the Imams up til Muhammad ibn Ismail, be welcome in other Ismaili congregations? Be they Nizari or one of the bohra communities? I've been a convert for 7 years but have lived in a region with very few muslims so have only had the company of a few Sunnis, but me being Non-binary and having social-anxiety has made it hard to really meet up and engage with them, I've seen myself as Ismaili for about 3-4 years, and recently moved away from home and do miss having some sort of religious fellowship, yet feel ostraziced for my identities among most muslims.

*edit addition for clarity, I left the question more open as in "welcome in the congregation", as I am aware that more Imam/Dai specific events are "bayaah exclusive", but am also interested in more open events or social events, and just generally where the line goes as I am only vaguely aware of the Nizari views but lack knowledge on the Musta'ali and other groups labeled Bohra. Also would never try to show up without talking to them about it, I've never entered a new no matter the affiliation mosque without having an email correspondance before.

So this event itself definitely occurred I know for sure, but I'm not close enough to the family to ask for an explanation - also within the family itself the details were hidden from the elders to prevent the marriage itself being stopped.

I'm trying to understand if it's even possible to walk up to the local Bohra community center and ask to register a non Bohra Shia as a member in order to marry them. So many questions come to mind, has anyone heard something similar?

I have read somewhere that shias ismailis and bohris are usually quite secular and liberal .

Surah Al-Qamar 1 says "The Hour has drawn near and the moon was split ˹in two˺." Many Muslims seem to think that this verse means that the moon was literally split into two pieces, in light the Hadith they believe. Needless to say, I find this explaination unconvincing. (There is no evidence that the moon has ever split into two pieces).

Moreover, Imam Shah Karim al-Husayni Aga Khan IV has said that the Quran is the only miracle of Islam. With all this in mind, what is the meaning of Al-Qamar 1?

As a follower of Sunni Ashari theology, and who is interested in philosophy, I like to look at what other sects say about Allahs Attributes.

I’ve read that Ismailis believe that Allah can’t be described with attributes at all, and that Allah doesn’t have any attribute.

Here is the link where I’ve read the Ismailis viewpoint: https://ismailignosis.com/2016/01/22/ismaili-teachings-on-the-oneness-of-god-tawhid-beyond-personalist-theism-and-modern-atheism/

Here is the Sunni view: Claiming that Allah can’t be described with Attributes is wrong. Let’s take the example of the Attribute “Creator”. You can’t say "Allah created all creation, but Allah is not the Creator." Actually, the phrase "A Being that created all creation" is just a longer name for "Creator", so why do you even use any speech to describe Allahs Actions at all?

How does Ismailis answer to that question?

I rarely see them in here tbh, I've heard of saudi and yemeni and syrian ismaili muslims, yemeni zaidi muslims and there is significant population of ahmaddiya in egypt. Tell me your experience with them!! or what you think of them or know about them!!

Howdy friends! I ask this question because the only Ismailis I know in real life are Indian. Am I mistaken to believe that the majority of Ismailis come from that background? I ask because the descendants of the Agha Khan IV seem to be Persian, not Indian. Persians make up a huge chunk of my religion(Baha'i). If you are a history buff(such as myself) the first Agha Khan was active in Persia(indeed the governor of Kerman) at the same time as our prophet the Báb.

I will be marrying an Ismaili soon and was curious if there were any non-Ismaili spouses in the Sugar Land/Houston area? Would love to hear your experiences/journey. I think it would also be great to connect as well with those who share similar experiences!

Just wondering bc he has an interesting story of leaving Islam and I can’t remember his name

I see some people on internet criticize Ismailis calling them money minded. They also say that for ismailis its all about money. And then the same people will say that Ismailis are very idiot with their money and they are just giving away their hard earned money to Aga Khan.

If we are money minded, then we can't be idiot giving away our money for nothing. So how can we be both. They need to pick one.

They also call one of the most educated communities of Islam ignorant and gullible.

For those who have not seen Ismailis closly, there is no hierarchy per say in Ismailis. But if there is any it may look like this

1. Teacher (they get the most respect). They get most respect, as they are believed to have character along with Education and they indulge in distribution the most valuable things for ismailis - Knowledge
2. Seniors - For their experience
3. Doctors - They get respect for their knowledge. And everyone wants to be friend with a doctor so that when they are in trouble they can get a honest examination.
4. Volunteers - They get respect for their contribution of time and knowledge
5. Artists - They get respect for their talent
6. Donors - They get respect for their contribution of money
7. Professionals - For their knowledge
8. Business personalities - For their knowledge and achievement.

You will see that money does not play as much of a big role as you think. Also Ismailis emphasize a lot on intellect, most of the time we are not gullible and ignorance is not promoted.

Anyone around UH wants to meet up. I live down the block from campus. I am one of the few-ex Ismailis whom met and communicated with key Ismaili leaders. I am confident my rants agaisnt leaders I've called out are saved to be used agaisnt me. Would love to go on youtube like Salim Lalani and vent out angusih Aga Con, Jamati Instituitons and its beloved leaders caused. Would love to expose Money Bapa, current and former leaders but can't do it alone. #nojamat #exismaili #confessionsofanexismaili

--Anoynomous Pathan

I'm asking this out of general curiosity. The three faiths are a little bit hard to understand for me. I think they have similarities, or is this just me being ignorant?

The media has been reporting "15-20 million" Ismailis since the 1940s. All articles from SMS's time and early years of Karim reported these figures. This number was never refuted by SMS or Karim. SMS was very vocal and displeased with the image of him and Aly Khan portrayed in the newspapers -- he said this in an interview. Karim was also not happy about the portrayal of his grandfather and father in the media and hired Fred Rosen as his PR agent in his early days to clean up his image and portray his image as a "respected voice on third world development issues" in the media. This is just to say that the Aga Khans kept a close eye on what was being reported in newspapers.

The world population has increased by 174% since 1950, while the Ismaili population has decreased, instead of increasing multiple folds, if there were 15-20 million Ismailis in the 50s.

Hella Picks in her new book wrote that she did not believe the Ismaili population numbers. Hella Picks was hired by AK's PR team (headed by Fred Rosen) to write a biography on AK. She followed Karim for a whole year and traveled a lot with him. The book was never published.

Let's estimate how many Ismailis actually exist:

US: 70k

Canada: 150k (1 million total Muslims in Canada)

Europe: 150k

Pakistan: 500k (According to BBC)

India: 500k

Bangladesh: 200K

Afghanistan: 200k (150K in 1993, as reported Central Asian Survey)

Tajikistan: 300K (U.S. state department reported that 3% of Tajikistan are Shia - this assumes every single Shia is Ismaili)

Kenya: 8K (source)

Syria: 28K (Official Syrian census)

UAE: 2.5K (Gulf News)

Tanzania: 40K (source)

Countries that I have not listed and accounting for inaccuracies in the above estimates: 1 million

Let's add some more for fun: 1 million

Total: 4 million

Missing about 11 million Ismailis.

Howdy friends. I know a lovely Baha'i friend who married an (equaly lovely) Ismaili man. They are both very successful in terms of education and job so I don't see finances being a problem.
Have you heard of an Ismaili marrying a Baha'i?

Hello Ismailis of the globe, I’m a 27 F based in Ontario, Canada & I’d like to get to know a man who’s Ismaili lol. Cake meets sherbet was a total fail for me and clearly going to Ismaili events isn’t really working lmaooooo. So ya if you’re down to talk, hit me up. Also no dick pics, thank youuu and yam

Y’all’s thoughts?

Why do Ismaili institutions emphasize on family values. Would like to get an ex-Ismaili perspective

As someone who has always basically been an atheist for my whole life I always found it weird when people switch from one religion to another. Especially one that appears to be more extreme in its social prescriptions and one that is much more literal.

As an outsider I was wondering what you guys think.