Irs Puns

Spells “theirs”?

It was just too taxing.

Now I'm wanted for tacks fraud.

Gsus

Turns out they prefer money.

IRS: It’s time for you to pay your taxes

Me: Ok, how much is it?

IRS: Well, that’s up to you to figure it out

Me: Cool, so I can pay as much as I want

IRS: Oh no! We know EXACTLY how much you owe and if you do it wrong you could go to jail

Because they single file to hide their numbers.

Their jobs are taxing.

After that, everything I touched turned into a muffler.

Me: Am I in trouble?

Auditor: Yes. In Dire Straits.

Taking money for the government is taxing

His business operations were shady

So far, it's been pretty taxing.

A taxer-Derby.

Boy, these jokes are really taking a toll on me.

Income taxidermy

Apparently they were paying their employees under the stable.

For tax porpoises.

Turns out it was a shell company.

That's what I call luck of the IRS

A very angry IRS agent called me and threatened me with serious fines and jail time for committing tax fraud.

I guess they take money laundering very seriously....

Should tortillas be sent flat rate? Is armor headgear sent over knight? Is an addicts mail tracked? Is mail to Gold's gym sent bulk rate? Should mail to a school's kindergarten be sent 1st class? Should the IRS send return receipts? just wondering...

Dear Dad,

University i$ really great.

I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard.

With all my $tuff, I $imply ¢an't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.

Love, your $usie.

I immediately replied back…

Dear Susie,

I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy.

Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.

Love, Dad

Because the IRS has no cents.

"This is too much - I'm exhausted!"

"...sounds taxing."

My SO: "You seem tired, did you have a busy night?"

Me: "No, I just did taxes. I didn't realize they can be so... taxing."

Pretty damn proud of myself for that one.

A penny saved, is actually about 1.25 pennies, once you account for Income Tax.

[my dad works for the Canadian tax department (IRS) and he used to always say that when I was a kid. He thought he was very funny. I'm now starting to see the wisdom in that statement.

Ir. ..ma...God!!

It joins the IRS and begins repossessing houses

(My first attempt at a Dad joke)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=82&v=xlIrI80og8c

http://imgur.com/6kIrWp5