But then I circled Bach.
But in the end, he went with plan Bee.
It’s Top Secret.
Unfortunately the contractors cut corners.
Tee ach ayyy tee!
But that's a bit too much.
But now I stand corrected.
But then they changed my mind
It was very time consuming, especially when I went for seconds.
they seem to always elect "nay".
I really hated the smell initially; the fumes would always make you a little horse.
Girlfriend: “babe, I’m pregnant”
Me trying to not lose it: “Hi, pregnant, I’m dad”
Forrest Gumption
I am a 28 year old male, and for as long as I can remember every time me and my dad move something, such as a chair, or a couch, or a coffee table, he said "alright I'll get the heavy end" and idk why I always just assumed he was being nice and getting the heavier side.
And it literally just occurred to me within the last few weeks when we picked something up, there's no heavy end. They're both the same weight 😭😭😭
Edit: I understand certain things have heavy ends, which is why I initially believed it. And then never questioned it any further.
Miss Lead!
..Y'know, because Lead is Pb on the periodic table..? All of my friends (okay fine, all one of my friends) just stared at me when I told him.. Thought you folks might appreciate it a little more...
I think it’s Stuck-home Syndrome
..and I let all my guest walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
HA
I said, they absolutely have space- he’s only 20 inches and 6 lbs. [holding my hands up showing how small he is].
Afterwards, I felt differently.
Little did those countries know, the US had a Trump card.
They’re replacing plastic water bottles with a Canada water.
But I said I Kant.
"Do the letters TG mean anything to you?" He asked.
"No"
"What about RP?"
"No they mean nothing to me, " I replied.
"What about AH?" He asked.
"Look," I said, "am I suspected of something?
"No sir," he replied. "These are just initial inquiries."
Re-roofing complete.
*Edit: reworded punchline. I think it might be better said "replacing my shingles" but I cannot for the life of me edit that part...
*ahem* without hacking.
We called her Auntie Up.
Thanks.
I'll call it diffiCULT
I’m in year 12 and we are getting our jersey’s where we can write something on the back and generally people make a pun with there name. I’ll give an example my friend’s name is Victor Jole and he made his name VJ Khaled with a pun with his initials and DJ Khaled. I need help for a pun cuz i’m really not creative. My name is Anush Kandula. pronounced anoosh kandoola and my nickname is either nush or nushy. Help please 🙏
People ask me sometimes, they say ( because they are wise to seek my counsel on this matter), "how is it that Norsemen came to be known as "Norwegians"?"
You see, back in days of Yore, when Norsemen first got it in their heads that the Brits and the Picts were a puny lot, ripe for the harvest so to speak, they first scouted the area by pretending to be tourists. They found themselves a nice sidewalk cafe operated by a couple limey weasels, and set their boots heavily on the outdoor table and ordered up a corned beast suitable to their needs. And ale. They needed some ale. You can't smash a horn down and demand "more ale, wench!" In a loud, commanding voice if you haven't had any in the first place.
The waitress was a slip of a lass, dark-complected, demure and quiet to match her appearance. She stammered out that, being a Green Initiative business, Ale was not only unavailable but philosophically out of place. But they had some lovely tea with a hint of lavender...
Thorrfin Skullsplitter leaned forward at this news, and bellowed, "we are not teetotalers!", pounding his fist on the iron-lace table.
Lenny Mcgreasel, one of the cafe's two owners, heard the commotion and injected his condescending, servile whine to the conversation, "is there anything we can bring the large gentlemen from our menu?", gesticulating to the hand-crafted hemp/flaxseed menu depicting what could only be described as a garden, rather than a list of things to eat.
Thorrfin's mate, Snorri Log-Bender, immediately ordered, as if he'd been thinking about this moment for some time, "what I'd like is to have some bacon salad"
Thorrfin was still muttering in his beard over not being a teetotaler. " I'm sorry sir, we only serve as food that which has grown fresh from the garden"' the waitress chirped. That was the last straw. With a shove of his boot, and a full dose of disgust, the table flew backwards.
"C'mon, Snorri", he said in disgust, and he stood, once again emoting, "we are not teetotalers"
Just then another small-faced waitress popped around the corner carrying tofu laced with kale and and whole-grain brown rice. Snorri saw his chance, and with a face of disgust he emoted,
"Nor Vegans"
And with that they bid their their host a hostile farewell, only to return two weekends later with a fully armed force of Vikings,- and established what would become the preeminent fast food of a millennia, fish and chips, served only with the darkest stout.
To hear the Engl
... keep reading on reddit ➡She had a change of heart.
Dad hat tip to u/xcammanx
In a statement released by doctors, it has been revealed that his palms were sweaty, knees weak and arms were heavy.. He presented with vomit on his sweater already.. Initial testing has revealed it was mums spaghetti
"It's a work in progress."
But it's growing on me.
despite the initial frosty response
But then it grew on me.
I said IDK as well.
Him: take off your clothes Me: What if I don't? Him: then I'll take off your clothes Me: why are you wearing my clothes?
.......His condition is now known to be 'Stable'
But in the end he went with plan Bee
