Incontinence Puns

A list of puns related to "Incontinence"

What do you call a bear with urinary incontinence?

A drizzly bear.

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👤︎ u/lfantine
📅︎ Sep 24 2020
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I called the Incontinence Hotline number.

The voice said, "Please hold."

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👤︎ u/Rav4xle
📅︎ Jun 29 2020
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As my impeccably dressed co-worker has aged, incontinence has set in.

He went from dapper Dan to diaper Dan.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Aug 07 2020
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All my relatives suffer from incontinence.

You could say diarrhea runs in the family.

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👤︎ u/Fsr_freak
📅︎ Mar 26 2020
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Coworker told me he was tired of people screwing up and “gross human incontinence”

I pissed myself laughing

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👤︎ u/Fill-Chapo
📅︎ Aug 30 2019
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I travel all over the world and I'm regular, then I come home and suddenly I'm incontinent.
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👤︎ u/Motile_Liriodendron
📅︎ Aug 11 2020
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I talk a lot about incontinency

I just can't hold it in.

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👤︎ u/joicseth
📅︎ Apr 15 2020
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Haven't been a dad very long, but here goes... How many incontinent people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Depends

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👤︎ u/btwrenn
📅︎ May 17 2019
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What do you call a large land mass that uncontrollably leaks into the ocean?

Incontinent

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👤︎ u/TheGogglesDo-Nothing
📅︎ Dec 01 2020
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My father's getting on in his years, so I asked his doctor what to do if he becomes incontinent. He turned to me and said....

"Depends."

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👤︎ u/boxbeat
📅︎ Jun 14 2018
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Did you hear about the incontinent hockey player and his new hairpiece?

He piddled and parted and pucked around.

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👤︎ u/Pluto_Rising
📅︎ Apr 19 2018
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Why can't incontinent people work at an intelligence agency?

Because they're leaking

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👤︎ u/RobbyLee
📅︎ Aug 29 2017
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My girlfriend asked me if I was incontinent

I responded "everyone but sailors is incontinent"

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👤︎ u/TQuake
📅︎ Feb 08 2018
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Did you hear the one about the incontinent giant?

It'll probably go over your head

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👤︎ u/mattreyu
📅︎ Dec 18 2017
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Ring ring... ring ring...

"Incontinence hotline, please hold."

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👤︎ u/cryptozoophagist
📅︎ May 17 2019
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What did the mama volcano say to the baby volcano when it wet the bed?

It's ok you are just incontinent.

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👤︎ u/aardvarkheart
📅︎ Oct 14 2018
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Where do people who can’t control their bladder live?

Incontinence

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👤︎ u/awol5943
📅︎ Apr 04 2018
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There are 7 continents

But with its low birth rate, soon Europe will be an incontinent.

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👤︎ u/ch3000
📅︎ May 05 2018
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What US state won't ever have to wear Depends^TM when it gets old?

Hawai'i - because it's not incontinent /original?

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👤︎ u/AbelianCommuter
📅︎ Aug 30 2017
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So, I tend to over-share when I drink ....

I think I have vowel incontinence.

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👤︎ u/crayolalightblue
📅︎ May 03 2016
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"Incontinence hotline. Please hold!"
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👤︎ u/Robot-Downey-Jr
📅︎ Jan 01 2019
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