British humour at its finest.
Why are vegans bad at egg humour?
You can’t yolk with vegans
Yes Dad! My old man had surgery couple of days ago hasn’t been himself for a few weeks, so tonight treated him to pizza. Was so glad he is feeling better and hasn’t lost his humour…
Me showing him the Domino’s menu
“Dad, look Two for Tuesday, buy one get one free any size”
My Dad with the biggest grin
“I’ll give you the money for the second one”
My surgeon has a very good sense of humour...
...When he's operating, I'm always in stitches.
I've outlawed dry humour in my house.
There is no need to be viscous.
He was real, at least in theory
Who said puns r the lowest form of humour?
My wife and I share the same sense of humour...
We have to. She doesn't have one.
[OC] My humour is broken.
Hope a large fraction of y'all have a sense of humour
My work doesn’t appreciate my humour. Maybe you guys will
I don't understand why people don't like toilet humour
Here in Canada, we don't just have a sense of humour.
We also know how to spell it.
Do you guys think “why did the chicken cross the road?” jokes will still exist in the future?
Or will they go eggstinct?
How do you save yourself from starving to death in the desert?
Eat the sand-which-is there.
I am a comedian and a mailman, here's my number one rule:
It's all about how it's delivered.
What do you call an iPhone with no sense of humour?
I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81
Doctor: I'm sorry, but we had to remove your colon.
My parents found this while camping... someone has a good sense of humour
Twins Mike and Brian both had the same medical condition..
Mike's operation went much better, and the doctor explained: "well, it's not Brian surgery".
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I thought this up just now, I hope its original
Here's something about Jokes about Umbrellas
I know a bunch of good jokes about umbrellas, but they usually go over people’s head
I ordered a glass of dark, tannin rich wine to go with my supper that was pretty disappointing.
Oh well... Que Syrah, Syrah.
My sense of humour used to be ironclad
It's a bit rusty now though
How do you spell 'queue' when it's a queue of Ambulances?
qu-E-U-E-U-E-U-E-U-E-U-E-U-EU-E-U-E-U-E-e-u-e....
Took a picture of me doing a poo and posted it online
On an unrelated note I'm not longer permitted to participate in shitposting
Do you know what you get when you boil a funny bone?
A laughing stock. It's humorous!
The last time I was involved in sexual intercourse.....
What do you call candy that can rap?
Em-in-em
(Also, first joke/post here!)
Why did the capillary keep looking in the mirror?
Because it was a little vein!
Poop jokes aren't my favorite kind of jokes
Truly a blinding sense of humour on show here.
Why was there a huge crowd to see the first guillotine execution?
Because it was the latest cutting edge technology.
I'm addicted to ordering hatchets from different countries and sniffing them incessantly...
I love foreign axe scents.
What criminals have the biggest balls?
How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?
A lot, because many Hans make light work
My girlfriend told me to stop making camera puns...
I told her to stop focusing on the negatives and develop a sense of humour.
She left me in a flash.
Man I hate dark humour
I can't really see what's so funny about it.
My humour is wasted on 9gag
Why isn’t there any gambling in Africa?
Because there are too many cheetahs
9 yo daughter: "You know, dad; I think I have your sense of humour."
Me (rather pleased): "Really?"
Her: "Yes. Would you like it back?"
My wife and I share the same sense of humour.
We have to....She doesn't have one.
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