Html 5 Puns

<GUTEN> should have been an HTML tag because it would be the guten tag. How has nobody thought of this.

Love Notes

Oops...A Daisy

https://preview.redd.it/wxa25n2a58c51.png?width=2478&format=png&auto=webp&s=8e61299d08db7234a2776473a1ad3c254e04ee80

https://www.space.com/meat-grown-in-space-station-bioprinter-first.html

The steaks have never been higher.

http://www.mit.edu/~puzzle/2019/puzzle/joke_o_lantern.html

If you're completely lost, click "SOLUTION" in the upper right, but it's worth trying to solve it yourself first.

One Dad Joke to rule them all...

He was all over the news.

sorry, people who have known other people who have been crushed in printing presses

In Poland we celebrate Father's Day today. Together with several friendly fathers, we have created a manual for the newborn fathers. Have fun :)

LINK: newther.com

I hear the service is going to be out of this world.

https://www.cnn.com/travel/article/aurora-station-luxury-space-hotel/index.html

There's no such thing as a poultry crime! (Stolen from a hero dad in country Australia http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/give-me-the-bloody-chicken-hero-dad-thwarts-chook-thief-outside-coles-20180109-h0fl5g.html )

Me: "How did it take them 13 days?"

Dad: "...maybe they went the Wong way."

I said, "Well, guess they didn't stock enough watermelon." She refuses to talk to me now...

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Link: http://www.nbcdfw.com/news/local/Smoke-Seen-for-Miles-from-Fire-near-Downtown-Dallas-422199263.html

https://www.thestar.com/news/gta/2016/07/19/salad-dressing-spill-on-dvp-ramp-causes-traffic-mayo-hem.html

So i was ask to post it here from a post in /r/screenshots/ , so i thought i'd add a story to it:

So, my father had asked me to make him a little sign up website, basic HTML format, that he could then copy and paste into a wordpress site that his Go-kart association uses. I made it, put it into a zip file, and e-mail him. I sent him a text to check his e-mail and how to use it. His response was this:

http://imgur.com/gallery/IG7mqVs

Here is the story. I suggested to the family that they might make a good mane course and got many groans for my trouble.

While taking the Tram Tour around the Africa enclosure at the Safari Park we passed a group of Wildebeest.

I turned to my wife and said "I don't remember this group of Wildebeest, they must be Gnu."

My 6th grade teacher had a reputation of being the meanest, strictest teacher on campus, but once I made it through his class, I realized he could be a jokester, too.

-In math class, he liked to tell a long, complicated story about a boy encountering a genie, eventually wishing for some odd things, just to end it with the punchline, "Gee, I'm a tree." (geometry)

-Another one of his long jokes consisted of a man being chased by a hearse. In a fit of desperation, he throws some Halls throat lozenges at it...."and the coffin went away."

-During study time, he would sometimes grab a balloon from his desk, blow it up, and proceed to slowly let air out of it, just to produce the squeaky noise.

-His favorite short joke: "Doctor, doctor, I broke my arm in three places!" "I advise you to stay out of those places."

-He was also probably the all-time leader of correcting, "Can I go to the bathroom?"

-He would also occasionally play opera music at the end of the day, not dismissing the class until we made it through an entire song without laughing.

-There were also a couple words that incited a specific reaction from him. Many of these words showed up often in history class, which is his favorite subject (probably because of all the jokes):

• CARGO - "cargo beep beep".

• RAY - Whenever the word or name "ray" was mentioned, he would always respond with "You can call me Ray, or you can call me Jay, but ya doesn't have to call me Johnson." Needless to say, we hated the math lesson about rays.

• HUDSON - During mentions of the Hudson River in history, he would always sing back "HUDSON 3-2-700."

• OKLAHOMA - Whenever Oklahoma came across, he would sing the famous line from Oklahoma! the musical. (with an especially long "ohhhhhhh!")

• SURELY - "...and don't call me Shirley." (but of course, who doesn't respond with that?)

• GERONIMOOOO!!!! - pretty self explanatory.

• Sticking with these obscure quotes and references, his two favorite days of the year are November 5th and March 15th.

Anyway, it was a fun year with that teacher. I'll add more of his quirks if I think of any.

-Also,

...because they were impatients.

I shared a story about a new supernova on facebook. Then my Dad and some others chimed in with this.

Here's the supernova story if you're interested: New Supernova in M82

http://www.octopuns.net/2013/12/98-poker.html