Hickory dickory dock, three mice ran up the clock.

The clock struck one.....the others escaped with minor injuries.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hmoney720
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
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How was the hickory doing?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JPersnicket
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
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Every year at the seasonal Hickory Farms mall kiosk...

Dad: So I heard they're opening up a Hickory Farms in Israel. Do you know what they're calling it?

Bemused Clerk: No, what?

Dad: Cheeses of Nazareth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zedlok
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2013
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A guy has a rough day and stops at Dick’s Place...

...he tells the owner and bartender that he’s a surgeon down at the hospital and he just wants to forget about everything for awhile.

Dick knows just the thing. He quickly whips up a thick, exotic beverage and places it in front of the worn out doctor. He takes one sip and his eyes light up. β€œWhat IS that?” β€œThat’s my signature almond daiquiri”, Dick tells him. The surgeon tells him it’s delicious, pays his bill and comes back the next day and the next day at the same time for the same thing: An almond daiquiri.

Before long, like clockwork, Dick is able to have it ready for him just before he comes in. But, one day as he is preparing the drink, he realizes that he’s run out of almonds! With no time to lose, he quickly substitutes the almonds with hickory nuts and sets the beverage on the bar.

The surgeon pops in, takes a big gulp, and immediately spits it all over the bar. He looks at the bartender and says, β€œThat’s not an almond daiquiri, Dick!” And Dick says, β€œNo, it’s a hickory daiquiri, Doc!”.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/5YearApril
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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I'm starting a line of wooden plates with insults carved on them.

I'm calling them Hickory Mockery Crockery.

(Originally posted in r/jokes)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/L_Circe
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
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A Doctor always stopped at a local bar after work for a hazelnut daiquiri - a special drink the bartender created just for him.

One day, the bartender ran out of the hazelnut flavor so he substituted hickory nuts instead. The doctor took one sip of the drink and exclaimed, β€œthis isn’t a hazelnut daiquiri!”

β€œNo I’m sorry”, replied the bartender, β€œIt’s a hickory daiquiri, doc”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dredgemate
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2018
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Asked my friend about his smoking habit.

I asked him if he smokes his cigarettes with applewood or hickory. He laughed but the people around us didn't.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dudewiththebling
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2016
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My dad's version of a well known nursery rhyme. He used to recite this all the time when I was a kid and then proceed to laugh hysterically for several minutes.

Hickory Dickory Dock

Three mice ran up the clock,

The clock struck one,

And the other two got away with minor injuries.

ISN'T THAT HILARIOUS

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BardLover108
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2013
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my dad just pulled a double dadjoke on me.

Dad: So a Doc walks into a bar and asks for a Daiquiri. The bartender serves him and the doc says "this is terrible! It tastes like hickory!" The Bartender replies, "Yeah, it's a Hickory Daiquiri Doc!" (like the children's rhyme)

Me: groans

Dad: What was the actual words of it again? I forget.

Me: Hickory Dickory Dock, the mice ran up the clock.

Dad: Oh yeah. Hickory Dickory Dock, the mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one... and the other two escaped with minor injuries.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oversized_canoe
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2014
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Hickory dickory dock, three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck one...

...and the other two escaped with minor injuries.

πŸ‘︎ 277
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Villainero
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2018
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