Is a judge's gown a law suit?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SaveFile1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
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One of my family's most valued heirlooms is a night gown my great-great-grandma bought from a notable psychologist...

It's a Freudian slip

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
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I bought a dressing gown.

I always wear it when putting sauce on a salad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2019
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As soon as the hospital made me put on one of those little gowns..

I knew the end was in sight.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mudpucket1969
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2018
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CANNIBAL: β€œHey, how did I get this cap, gown, and diploma?”

ME: β€œit must have been the grad-U-ate”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlackSaliva
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2018
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I've got this friend in Japan. Her name's Kim.

So Kim runs an undergarment and such clothing store, and I recently ordered myself some pyjamas. I fortunately she got the orders mixed up and sent me some type of dressing gown instead. All I could say was Kim,oh-no!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnekLord666
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
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A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.

A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.

She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,

"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely:

"Are - my - test - results - back?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RabbitHODL
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
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Why did the pokΓ©mon go to the hospital?

Because his bulb is sore!

>!Bulbasaur!<

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xyon_Peculiar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
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How do you make antifreeze?

Hide her dressing gown

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Completely_Baked
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2020
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Just got my own dad

He called to brag about some home gown jokes they just thought up.

I asked if these were home 'grown' or 'groan'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/red3biggs
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2016
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Got a customer pretty good last night (Halloween)

So a group of guys come into the shop, in various costumes. One of them is wearing a dressing gown and holding a fork and disconnected plug socket thingy.

I asked him what he was, and he said he was a child that stuck a fork in an electrical socket. He was annoyed that nobody could guess it, so I replied:

"I know, it must've been pretty shocking for you."

My colleague sent me to stock out after that.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tote_Sport
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2015
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So me and my girlfriend were at the hospital for pelvic/ appendix pains

Her mom and I were in the examination room when the doctor had her get out of her pants and change into a gown and examined her lower area and said. "Wow you've got a perfect vagina" I couldn't help but say... "Well it's definitely not in her jeans" Her and her mom both looked at me in amazement. Totally worth it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_stay_inspired
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2015
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My fiance is watching a lot of 'Say Yes To The Dress'....

Here are a few of my peanut gallery comments to pass the time....

"I'm going to open my own wedding dress store. It's going to be called 'The Tulle Shop'".

"TLC is coming out with a new show that's about buying underwear. It's called 'Say Ja To The Bra'".

"What type of wedding dress did the future wife of the New York Yankee buy? A ball gown."

Indian-themed weddings are also a gold mine because of the "sari" dress. Too many to list here. Stuff along the lines of "I feel sari she has to pick between those two dresses". "She'll be sari if she doesn't pick that dress."....the list goes on and on...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TeeItForeward
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2015
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As soon as they put me in that hospital gown...

I knew my end was in sight.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2019
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