What do you call a Minnesotan gang member?

An OG Golly.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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One day a guy dies...

...and finds himself in hell. Walking around, he runs into the devil.

Devil: Why are you so sad?

Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell.

Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?

Guy: Sure, I love to drink.

Devil: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, Diet Coke. We drink until we throw up and then we drink some more.

Guy: Gee, that sounds great.

Devil: You a smoker?

Guy: You better believe it.

Devil: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from around the world and smoke our friggin' lungs out. If you get cancer, it's okay -- you're already dead.

Guy: Golly!

Devil: I bet you like to gamble, too.

Guy: Yes, as a matter of fact I do.

Devil: Good, because Wednesday is gambling day. Craps, blackjack, horse races, you name it. You like to do drugs?

Guy: Yes, I love to do drugs. You don't mean...?

Devil: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. Smoke a doobie the size of the Titanic. You can do all the drugs you want, and you'll never die -- you're already dead.

Guy: Neat! I never realized hell was such a happenin' place!

Devil: You gay?

Guy: No.

Devil: Oh, you're gonna hate Fridays

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DylanTheG999
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
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My Sister complained that her office was cold...

... And her husband suggested she move her desk into the corner because it's always 90 degrees.

She was not as amused as he was.

πŸ‘︎ 508
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joealarson
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2014
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Country girl goes to visit her big city cousin.

So the two girls get invited to a dance. The country girl thinks this might be too high brow for her, and tells her cousin, β€œGolly, them city fellers might think I’m just a dumb hick.” Her cousin says, β€œDon’t worry. Just do as I do and you’ll be fine.” After hours of dancing they got tired, so they sat down. Another guy comes and asks the city girl to dance. She smiles sweetly and says β€œI’m contemplating matrimony and I think I’d like to sit.” So when the next guy comes up to ask the country girl to dance she smiles confidently and says, β€œI’m constipated on macaroni and I think I’d like to shit.”

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2018
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What do you call a Minnesotan gang member?

An OG Golly

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report

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