Are German puns allowed??
I often worry about German sausages
Basically I fear the wurst.
Edit: thanks for my first award ya loonies ;)
How does two German car enthusiast cowboys greet each other?
I was thinking that I am the kindest person in the world. Then I saw German kids.
What is a German anesthesiologists favorite time of day
How does the German baker greet his customers ?
Hey, German speakers. What do Germans call Mayor McCheese?
I thought I saw a German sausage fly past my window, but it was actually a seabird.
I think I’ve taken a tern for the wurst.
The WHO have a German Doctor now heading up their COVID response..
.. He's Dr Hans Sanitizer.
I just found out that in WWII, my grandpa killed 11 German pilots on one raid...
... but the German Luftwaffe (Air Force) kicked him out for being a terrible airplane mechanic...
A English man, a Spaniard, a French man, and a German. Go to a club. The guy on stage asks if they can see him. They said
How do German Bakers say hello?
I have an irrational fear of being in a small room, packed with Germans.
I told my doctor and he said I have Klaustrophobia.
What do you call the German man that fell into a tub of disinfectant?
My brother said he would gift me either a short sleeved shirt or a German sausage.
I hope for the vest but expecting the wurst.
A German built a swimming pool around his table.
Two Germans are a bar in London
"Two martinis, please."
I bought a German shepherd today and named him Lord.
Now I can truly say the Lord is my shepherd
Why do Germans love beer so much?
What do you call a disgruntled German?
What do you call a blind German?
How do you describe a blind German?
Those German electricians really work together when their Cities have power outages.
Many Hans make light work.
I couldn't think of anything really new and humorous to say about my German sausage...
So I went to r/YourJokeButWurst to see if they had any advice.
I really hope I don't get addicted to German sausage again
Those days were the Wurst.
I don't like German sausages, especially their jokes...
Did you know what did the Grrman Bread said to another German Bread after tapping on his shoulder ?
edit : i fucked up the title
How does the German baker greet people?
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. We are very efficient and not funny.
I'm developing a fear of German sausages
Winning a German sausage eating contest is all about your mind set
You hope for the best, but prepare for the wurst
My son asked: “Dad, have you seen my sunglasses?”
I replied: “No son, but have you seen my dad glasses?”
Had to remove a load of German names and stuff from my pre-owned iPhone..
A pun for all the German speakers here
Germans are so childish, they always play with their food.
What the Poland man did, after adding German mugs to his collection?
How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, they are very efficient and have no sense of humor.
What did the man say to the sad German egg noodle?
You'll always be spaetzle to me!
I’ve been trying to pick up on German humor recently.
What did the Germans say when they lost WW2?
Whenever I'm sad my German friend throws bread at me
A nice game of gluten tag always cheers me up.
My son asked me if i could count numbers in German.
I received an email today from the owner of a German sausage processing plant, he said I could have it for only 1000€
I agreed and wired him the money. What’s the wurst that could happen?
How do you say unintended pregnancy in German?
what do you call a blind German
A german tourist jumped in the freezing water to save my dog. After he climbed out, he said, “here is ze dog, dry him off and keep him warm, he vill be fine. I asked him, “are you a vet?”
He said, “vet? I’m fucking soaking”
Why was the German boy sad when sister ran away with his 3-Musketeers Candy Bar ??
Because he was Far-from-nougat!
I have a friend who teaches Germanic languages.
I asked him if he likes those dots that go over certain vowels.
He replied, "Umm, lots!"
I asked a German girl for her number and I'm still waiting for the rest of the numbers
What do you call a female german baker?
What is it called when you spend an hour in the bookstore browsing for German philosophers?
When writing in German, is the word for sausage capitalised or not?
It’s a wurst case scenario.
How do Celiac Germans greet eachother?
A German friend of mine actually installed a bath around his desk !?..
My grandpa was responsible for downing 43 German planes in WW2.
To this day he still holds the record as the worst mechanic in the Luftwaffe.
What did the Germans say when Hitler killed himself?
What do Germans think of sausages?
What do you call a meme made by a grateful german?
Got told this one is scouts a long time ago. If you’re Russian when you’re walking in the bathroom and German when you come out, what are you while you’re in the bathroom?
I’m in charge of the reader board at work
I found a specific hobby of adding alliteration to German philosophers’ names
Glad I found my Nietzsche niche
A German car manufacturer walks into a saloon
What do you call an angry German
Everyone says that German sausages are the best
I think they’re the wurst
Where will you find a happy naysayer German?
I've heard the german army only liked one type of pastry.
I wanted to go over to my German girlfriend's house at 8:51...
But she said "nein" to nine to nine.
My grandad was responsible for 28 downed german planes in WW2.
Still to this day holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.
How many germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Because Germans do not have humor.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are sitting in a room...
...a man enters and asks them "Can you see me?" and they respond;
Why don’t Germans teach algebra in school?
Nobody can understand the Bavariables!
I painted a German Shepherd
A group of German geologists recently made an interesting discovery within a mountain range of northern Italy
The team unearthed a layer of rock tessellations resembling a violin as viewed from behind.
As of yet they have no name for this strata variance.
I'm on a plane and the lunch choices are: white meat chicken or German sausage. Unfortunately, I'm seated in the last row.
I'm hoping for the breast, but preparing
for the wurst.
Why did the blind German mistakenly support Hitler?
He thought he was a fellow member of the Not See Party.
EYE SEE what you did there ;)
I know 10 words in German.
But I can only pronounce nein.
How do you talk with a German?
You co-munich-cate with them.
German sausage is the wurst
How do you greet a German baker?
What do you call a blind german...