They tortured George Washington after he died.
They had him drawn and quartered.
Where did George Washington keep his armies?
In his sleevies.
What did George Washington say to his reinforcements?
You musket down here
What did George Washington say to his men before they stepped into the boat?
Men, step in the boat.
I made a post on TIL about George Washington,
it got removed because it was “too General”.
George Washington predicted that some day in the future, a dollar bill will contain his likeness.
In that sense, he was on the money.
You ever notice how George Washington only got a big stick, and everyone else got huge memorials? I guess that's why they call it the Washington Post.
The guy who made this was a George Washington Carver
Peanuts are great and all, but do you know what George Washington Carver SHOULD have been famous for?
Mount Rushmore.
What do you call George Washington's false teeth?
Presidentures
What is George Washington’s favorite animal?
A buck
Why did George Washington have trouble sleeping?
Because he couldn’t lie.
If George Washington, Ben Franklin, James Madison and Alexander Hamilton play D&D, do they roll for constitution?
Where did George Washington get his hatchet?
The chopping mall
What did King George think about George Washington?
He thought he was revolting!
George Washington is the only president to not blame the previous administration for his problems
I was named after George Washington
My name isn't the same as his I was just named after he was.
What would George Washington do if he were alive today?
Scream and scratch his coffin.
While visiting George Washington's estate, Mount Vernon...
My Dad went inside the old outhouse and said "It says here, for a good time call Martha!" at which point he stepped outside the door, put his hands up to his mouth and called "MAAARTHAAA!!!"
To me at age 10, this was the funniest thing he ever said.
What did George Washington say to his men before they got onto the boat?
Men get onto the boat
TIL: George Washington predicted that eventually the $1 bill will contain his likeness.
In that regard, he was on the money.
George Washington predicted that one day, a dollar bill will bear his likeness.
In that regard, he was on the money.
George Washington is the only president to have been drawn and quartered.
Where did George Washington keep his armies?
In his sleevies.
