What’s a Lincoln’s favorite meal?

Continental breakfast.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rrenphoenixx
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Why couldn't Abraham Lincoln be arrested?

He's in a cent

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MoondogGLOVER1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
🚨︎ report
Penny production with Abraham Lincoln’s face seems to be quite low this year.

It’s only one percent.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cabbithunt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I just found out that β€œLincoln” made about $300 million in movie theatres.

Which is weird. Lincoln usually doesn’t do too well in theatres.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
🚨︎ report
They made a mistake on the statue of Lincoln.

It was a monumental error

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/UncleFuckingIroh
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
If Abraham Lincoln had gone on a hunger strike there would have been an Emaciation Proclamation.

Emaciation/Emancipation

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JukeboxSommelier
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Lincoln Memorial say when it got pepper in its nose?

STACHOO!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/diceblue
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What do Abraham Lincoln biographies and Instagram promoters have in common?

Lincoln bio.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/emagdaleno
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Anyone want to help me make a TV show about Abraham Lincoln?

The plan is to shoot it in front of a live audience.

πŸ‘︎ 617
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What did Abraham Lincoln say when he watched a Call of Duty killcam?

Nice play.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePegaKris
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
🚨︎ report
How many pennies in a roll of pennies have a Lincoln face?

It's actually one per cent.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lfantine
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did Lincoln give the Gettysburg Address? /r/Jokes/comments/ghs2js/…
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tuhawaiki
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is Abe Lincoln the least guilty out of all the presidents of the USA?

Because he is In a cent

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know Abraham Lincoln lived in Pennsylvania?

Surely you've heard of his Gettysburg Address!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/89iroc
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
NBC is coming up with a docudrama about the life of Abraham Lincoln.

The finale will be shot before a live audience.

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the cannibal love Abraham Lincoln?

Because of the greatest speech ever written, "Four score and seven ears ago..."

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Y2KoNo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
🚨︎ report
How do I know Abraham Lincoln never had trouble with the law?

He's in a cent.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why hasn't Abraham Lincoln ever been charged with a crime?

He's in a cent.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OneCoolGuy234
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln guilty?

Because he was in-a-cent

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ItzPhoen1x
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
You know they say JFK and Abraham Lincoln were the most open minded presidents
πŸ‘︎ 39
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spoonicide
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2018
🚨︎ report
Why was Abraham Lincoln never put in jail? reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zvekl
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
John F. Kennedy and Abraham Lincoln,

Were truly open-minded.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Squatyslav
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Abe Lincoln was shot in the Ford theater

Wouldn't have happened in a Chevy

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Captain_Karfuzzel
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
🚨︎ report
I own an axe that belonged to Abraham Lincoln

I replaced the head once,and the handle has been replaced twice.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Who killed Abraham Lincoln?

A clown walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask him a few questions.

Officer: What’s 2+2?

Clown: (counts on his fingers) … 4!

Officer: Good.Β  What’s the square root of 100?

Clown: (thinking fiercely) … 10!

Officer: Very good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln?

Clown: Ummmm … I don’t know.

Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow.

The clown goes home and calls up one of his friends, who asks him if he got the job. The clown says, excitedly, β€œNot only did I get the job, I’€™m already working on a murder case!”

Source: http://bestcleanfunnyjokes.com/who-killed-abraham-lincoln/

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tfraymond
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
🚨︎ report
My bank sells repo cars. The other day, they had a Lincoln sedan for sale...

I pulled beside the shiny car, beaming at the price and quality...except I noticed the back passenger door seemed have water dripping out the side panel. I giggled to myself:

Might as well call it a'Leakin, amirite?

😎😎😎😎😎

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CurbsideChaos
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What did Abraham Lincoln say when he was arrested?

I'm in-a-cent

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gluttonysin4
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
🚨︎ report
TIL: The Lincoln penny debuted on the Anniversary of his birth...

It all makes cents now!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Why doesnt matthew mcconaughey's lincoln have a left turn signal?

Because it goes all right all right all right

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/threecheers4jim
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2018
🚨︎ report
The mailman was confused by President Lincoln's orders.

He was told to deliver to the Gettysburg Address.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Why didn't Abe Lincoln commit crimes?

Because he's in a cent!

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/iceberger3
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2017
🚨︎ report
Conversation between Lincoln and his peers

Lincoln: I shall abolish slavery in the country of freedom Peers: what in tarnation ?? Lincoln: yes, this entire nation

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jalelninj
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2018
🚨︎ report
"I do the very best I know how--the very best I can; and I mean to keep doing so until the end." A. Lincoln

Which Lincoln said this?

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Da_Moose123
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2018
🚨︎ report
Abraham Lincoln is the most pure president to have ever held office.

He was always very in-a-cent.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Red_Road
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2013
🚨︎ report
Did you know that Abraham Lincoln was wrongly accused?

Turns out he was in a cent.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nyaleo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Historians are now saying that Abraham Lincoln never felt guilt or shame...

He was in a cent.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2016
🚨︎ report
You know, I was named after Abraham Lincoln

He was named in 1809 and I was named in 1990

πŸ‘︎ 39
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sethborders
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2013
🚨︎ report
Lincoln was the least guilty president

Because he was in a cent

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
NBC is developing a new realistic docudrama about Abraham Lincoln.

The finale will be shot before a live audience.

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2019
🚨︎ report
HBO is making a new docudrama about the life of Abraham Lincoln.

The finale will be shot before a live audience.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
🚨︎ report
NBC is planning an old-fashioned sitcom about Abraham Lincoln.

It will be shot before a live audience.

πŸ‘︎ 83
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2018
🚨︎ report
The least guilty president is Abraham Lincoln.

It's because he's in a cent.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Maise12
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Lincoln was the least guilty US president

He's in a cent.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2018
🚨︎ report
abraham lincoln never committed a crime

he was in a cent

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tehferretgamer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2018
🚨︎ report
Why was Abraham Lincoln never found guilty of a crime?

He was in a cent.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ande4100
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know that Matthew McConaughey's Lincoln can't make left turns?

It just goes all right, all right, all right...

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BaronVonCodpiece
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2016
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.