If Abraham Lincoln had gone on a hunger strike there would have been an Emaciation Proclamation.
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︎ Nov 20 2020
What did the Lincoln Memorial say when it got pepper in its nose?
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︎ Nov 25 2020
What do Abraham Lincoln biographies and Instagram promoters have in common?
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︎ Nov 03 2020
What did Abraham Lincoln say when he watched a Call of Duty killcam?
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︎ Sep 13 2020
Anyone want to help me make a TV show about Abraham Lincoln?
The plan is to shoot it in front of a live audience.
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︎ Jan 15 2020
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︎ May 12 2020
How many pennies in a roll of pennies have a Lincoln face?
It's actually one per cent.
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︎ Mar 25 2020
Why is Abe Lincoln the least guilty out of all the presidents of the USA?
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︎ Feb 25 2020
Why did the cannibal love Abraham Lincoln?
Because of the greatest speech ever written, "Four score and seven ears ago..."
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︎ Mar 08 2020
How do I know Abraham Lincoln never had trouble with the law?
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︎ Feb 19 2020
Did you know Abraham Lincoln lived in Pennsylvania?
Surely you've heard of his Gettysburg Address!
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︎ Oct 12 2019
NBC is coming up with a docudrama about the life of Abraham Lincoln.
The finale will be shot before a live audience.
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︎ Sep 28 2019
I'm the proud owner of an axe that once belonged to Abraham Lincoln...
I replaced the head once,and the handle twice, but it feels good to own a piece of American history.
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︎ Dec 11 2019
Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln guilty?
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︎ Jul 01 2019
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︎ Oct 30 2019
Abe Lincoln was shot in the Ford theater
Wouldn't have happened in a Chevy
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︎ Oct 15 2019
John F. Kennedy and Abraham Lincoln,
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︎ Aug 19 2019
Why hasn't Abraham Lincoln ever been charged with a crime?
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︎ Jan 27 2017
You know they say JFK and Abraham Lincoln were the most open minded presidents
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︎ Oct 27 2018
My bank sells repo cars. The other day, they had a Lincoln sedan for sale...
I pulled beside the shiny car, beaming at the price and quality...except I noticed the back passenger door seemed have water dripping out the side panel. I giggled to myself:
Might as well call it a'Leakin, amirite?
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︎ Sep 13 2019
What did Abraham Lincoln say when he was arrested?
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︎ Apr 12 2019
TIL: The Lincoln penny debuted on the Anniversary of his birth...
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︎ Mar 12 2019
Why doesnt matthew mcconaughey's lincoln have a left turn signal?
Because it goes all right all right all right
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︎ Nov 18 2018
The mailman was confused by President Lincoln's orders.
He was told to deliver to the Gettysburg Address.
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︎ Jan 31 2019
"I do the very best I know how--the very best I can; and I mean to keep doing so until the end." A. Lincoln
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︎ Oct 11 2018
Conversation between Lincoln and his peers
Lincoln: I shall abolish slavery in the country of freedom
Peers: what in tarnation ??
Lincoln: yes, this entire nation
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︎ Aug 08 2018
Why didn't Abe Lincoln commit crimes?
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︎ May 17 2017
Did you know that Abraham Lincoln was wrongly accused?
Turns out he was in a cent.
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︎ Jul 27 2017
Historians are now saying that Abraham Lincoln never felt guilt or shame...
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︎ May 25 2016
Abraham Lincoln is the most pure president to have ever held office.
He was always very in-a-cent.
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︎ Nov 01 2013
What do they call a traffic jam in the Lincoln Tunnel?
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︎ May 16 2017
What do you call Abe Lincolns poo?
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︎ May 16 2017
You know, I was named after Abraham Lincoln
He was named in 1809 and I was named in 1990
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︎ Nov 09 2013
Abe Lincoln's House
Girlfriends family went to visit the house that Abe Lincoln was born in. I said, "You know how they knew it was his house even though it's been all these years?" They looked at me with curiosity. I said "Their name was still on the mailbox"
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︎ May 02 2016
Lincoln was the least guilty president
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︎ Nov 12 2019
NBC is developing a new realistic docudrama about Abraham Lincoln.
The finale will be shot before a live audience.
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︎ Feb 04 2019
I own an axe that belonged to Abraham Lincoln
I replaced the head once,and the handle has been replaced twice.
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︎ Aug 08 2019
HBO is making a new docudrama about the life of Abraham Lincoln.
The finale will be shot before a live audience.
π︎ 7
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︎ Aug 19 2019
The least guilty president is Abraham Lincoln.
It's because he's in a cent.
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︎ Apr 05 2019
NBC is planning an old-fashioned sitcom about Abraham Lincoln.
It will be shot before a live audience.
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︎ May 21 2018
Lincoln was the least guilty US president
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︎ Jul 29 2018
abraham lincoln never committed a crime
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︎ Sep 24 2018
Why was Abraham Lincoln never found guilty of a crime?
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︎ May 08 2018
Did you know that Matthew McConaughey's Lincoln can't make left turns?
It just goes all right, all right, all right...
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︎ Apr 05 2016
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