Guy Fury
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👤︎ u/Evansonly
📅︎ Jun 18 2020
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Nck Fury
👍︎ 42
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👤︎ u/OTG_SLAYA
📅︎ Aug 02 2019
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Hell hath no fury like...
👍︎ 85
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📅︎ May 14 2014
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Dadjoked while watching Fury

Me: This movie is intense!

Husband: No, it's in tanks.

Me: scowls

👍︎ 8
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📅︎ Oct 26 2014
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Watching Fury with my girlfriend last night...

Her: "this movie is intense!"

Me: "Actually, they're tanks"

Cue eye roll and groan

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ Feb 08 2015
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So I've started wearing boxing gloves while I vacuum.

Just call me Dyson Fury.

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👤︎ u/OliPark
📅︎ Apr 12 2021
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Director!

My friend was promoted to a Director the other day. I congratulated him and asked if it felt more like Spielberg or Fury. I said Fury is the one I’d pick.

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ Apr 08 2021
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Number wars, a dad joke story.

6 couldn't believe it. 7 had finally gone off the deep end. 7 had long offended 6. A repeat 6 offender if you will. But this was unforgivable. 9 was his best friend. How could he do this to his best friend? How could it be that 7 ate 9?

6, filled with fury, called his friends 2 and 4. They would get even. 10 was the best friend of 7 you see. 2, 4 and 6 ate 10 to get even. They then began plotting further revenge, but 7 acted first. He gathered 1, 3 and 5 together to take down 6.

Realizing that the odds were against them, 2, 4 and 6 retreated. Their only option was to turn to 12 who had twice the resources 6 had. 7 couldn't follow.

12 quickly called 3 to find out what the root of 7's attack on 9. 3 wasn't sure. He had only supported 7 because of a long standing friendship. But 3 promised to get to the root cause.

Meanwhile, 7's scheming was not yet done. 12 was powerful, but there was one who could reverse his decision to harbor 6. If he could just convince 21, nicknamed blackjack, to reverse 12's decision, it would all be over.

Three times 7 went to 21's compound. On the third try he was able to get through. After explaining that 6 had masterminded the elimination of 10, a grand meeting of the numbers was called.

Both 6 and 7 argued over the whole thing. 13 had the unlucky task of adjudicating the meeting. Each time 13 made an argument, 6 and 7 would add to it by shouting over each other.

Finally, 21 had had enough. "7, why did you eat 9"

7 responded "I just wanted to get 3 square meals." 21 had 7 eliminated for initiating the battle and 6 jailed for masterminding 10's death. And the war was over.

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📅︎ Mar 27 2021
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Que es un oso enojado?

Un furiOSO

👍︎ 13
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📅︎ Oct 29 2020
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My wife yelled at me after I ate all of our English pastries

Hell hath no fury like a woman sconed

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👤︎ u/PygmeePony
📅︎ Jun 24 2020
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Just yellow please

One day, an elderly woman was walking along the street, coming home from the supermarket. Her bag of groceries was especially heavy that day, and as she passed Nathan Hale's Used Cars, she got an idea that she could drive herself to the store and save a lot of shoe leather, time and aching muscles. She walks into the car dealership and, as it just so happens, gets the owner himself. He asks her what kind of car she wants and she replies,

"Well, sonny, I can't remember the name exactly, but it has something to do with hate or anger."

The owner replies, "Well, let's see... Oh yes, you want a Plymouth Fury! We have a couple on the lot. What color do you prefer?"

The lady has some trouble explaining the exact color to him, so she reaches into her shopping bag, takes out an ear of corn, strips down the shucks and says, "I want this color sonny."

To which Nathan replies, "Ma'am I'm sorry, but we don't have any in this color. Could I show you a nice blue one?"

"No son, I want this color."

"But ma'am, they didn't make that color! Maybe a cherry red one would suit you?" says the owner, obviously worried about losing a sale.

By this time, the old lady gets mad, and starts throwing things at the owner, thereby chasing him out of the office and into the lot. One of the salesmen, coming into the office from the back door, notices the disruption and asks the secretary what the old woman was so upset about.

The secretary replies, "Apparently, Hale hath no Fury like the woman's corn!"

👍︎ 9
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📅︎ Jul 08 2019
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My housemate might be a dad

To annoy a female housemate we were flicking bits of sweetcorn at her hair. In response, she escalated the game and threw an orange into my face.

The only way i got through the ordeal was because of what another of my housemates said next. After a long silence, as im holding my face he says "..hell hath no fury like a woman corned".

👍︎ 809
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📅︎ Dec 02 2013
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At Mad Max last weekend...

The scene where Max is grabbed by the Pole Cat,

http://cdn.collider.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/mad-max-fury-road-image-the-war-rig.jpg

and ends up getting dumped onto the car with the drums and guitar guy

http://i.guim.co.uk/static/w-620/h--/q-95/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2015/3/31/1427821675682/5e25da37-61d7-44fd-a9a3-b2f5b8b5a791-620x372.jpeg

I leaned over to my GF and said "It looks like he's jumped onto... the bandwagon" She totally lost it :)

👍︎ 57
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📅︎ Jun 12 2015
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I jokingly threw my pastry at my wife...

She was absolutely furious. I've never seen a person get this angry before. I guess it holds true to the old saying:

Hell hath no fury like a woman sconed.

👍︎ 35
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📅︎ Jun 19 2015
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I prefer to use the vacuum cleaner with boxing gloves on

They call me Dyson Fury

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👤︎ u/Barderz
📅︎ Aug 11 2020
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