A pirate threatening to gouge another pirate: “Would you like to have a wood eye?

“Wood eye?”

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👤︎ u/TGus116
📅︎ Oct 01 2018
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Dirty NASA experiment unearthed

NASA decided to send a vegetable to space. After the rough takeoff the spud soiled himself.

Operation Spud-Nik turned violent when the astronauts, due to unforeseen circumstances, ran out of food. It wasn't long before the five guys came up with a plan. They unearthed him and gouged his eyes out. As unappealing as it sounded, spud was sliced up, fried and eaten. Noone seemed to mind a little assault. Sometimes spaceflight is unpredictable and dirty sacrifices must be made.

👍︎ 3
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📅︎ Feb 13 2020
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I read in the news that cataract surgery costs have gone up by 400%.

Makes me want to gouge my eyes out.

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👤︎ u/sodomicity
📅︎ Jan 04 2019
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A coworker was teaching me something she learned in a class about Iran's history over chat

Her: Once, a prince tried to overthrow his father, the Shah. So his father killed all his son's men in front of him, then gouged out his eyes

Me: I guess he...

( •_•)>⌐■-■

...didn't see that one coming.

(⌐■_■)

Her: ಠ_ಠ

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👤︎ u/tecun_uman
📅︎ Feb 23 2015
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