A list of puns related to "Equator"

If you place all currently living people on the equator around the Earth,

at equal distance from each other,

...

most of them would get wet and some will surely drown

As a globe restorer, I never turn down projects where I have to fill in missing countries or islands. But missing equators?

Thatβs when I draw the line.

Going past the equator really...

Crosses the line.

If the human population held hands aroud the equator

A significant portion of them would drown

What do you call a theater production near the equator that uses figurative or metaphorical themes?

Tropecal!

I came across this equation on my chemistry test - C2H6O...

Looks like I have an alcohol problem.

Why was Gimli so interested in plotting equations on an x-y coordinate plane?

He heard it involved axes.

My teacher wants me to simplify the equation.

I told him I'm no simp.

I don't know guys.

I'm currently creating a sculpture of a maths equation but I'm really struggling to finish.

I just can't figure it out.

what do you call an Arab who formulated the quadratic equation?

Al-gebra

Why is it hard to measure power usage with differential equations?

Because Watt and Euler don't mix.

What's a tree's favorite math equation?

Logorithmic

Time for some quadROOTic equations

My friend was arrested because he was carving equations into a block of quartz.

He was charged with manufacturing crystal math.

I guess we just didn't have any equation.

I'm trying to work out a complicated maths equation with a broken calculator

But itβs only adding to the problem

How to make a seven even without doing any mathematical equations

You remove the S

What is the equation for the speed of fright?

Eeek! = MC Scared

Dad Tells Time With His Hat

My dad worked in construction for most of his life, and because he worked with his hands, he sacrificed many watches. But if you don't have a watch, how are you to tell time? My dad has a great sense of humor and is always thinking of new ways to do things to make them more practical or thinking of ways to change things to make them work better for him. So after spending **way** too much money on a heavy duty watch that inevitably broke on him, he came up with a better solution.

He used the working part of a clock and stuck it on the inside rim of his hat, so if he wanted to know what the time was, he just had to look up. Simple. And the way his hat was, you couldn't see the clock when looking at him unless you were underneath him and looking up.

And then came the funny part. Every time he was asked what time it was, he would look up at the sun, scan the horizon, pretend to do a math equation in his head, and tell them the exact time down to the minute. I've witnessed him doing this a few times but never gave it away. The look of surprise and confusion this gave people was priceless.

My dad had done other funny things like this, but this was by far the funniest.

Some students needed help calculating the number of food and drinks they'd need for a party. Their teacher responds...

"What's the equation? (occasion)"

Looking for a Math Tutor?

Call 1-800-[(10x)(ln(13e))]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]

What did the math teacher say to the difficult math equation?

I will calc U later!

Atheists can't solve exponential equations because they don't belive in higher powers

An atheist refused to solve a quadratic equation.

Because they do not believe in higher powers.

What do you call a gathering of math nerds?

A root of squares.

I felt so damn clever this morning (Ordinary Differential Equation) imgur.com/6HkYIP8

What do you call a math problem that you can touch and feel?

An algebraille equation.

What is a duck's favorite equation?

The quackdratic equation.

**bonus:**

What is a duck's favorite restaurant? *quacker barrel.*

What did the math problem say to the equation before it left?

I'll calcu-LATER!

I pour my root beer into a square cup.

Now it's just beer.

What do you call the beat to which a vice president dances while solving complex mathematical equations?

An Al Gore-rhythm

Which part of the world is most suitable for building petroleum vehicles?

Down near the equator I easily Madagascar

So my math textbook has a "Math Humor" section...

http://imgur.com/a/IXCKw

A man comes up with a great idea for a new shipping method

A young man comes up with a great idea for a new shipping method. He designs everything himself, hires people to create models, and deduces that he can use old fashioned boating technology to increase shipping speeds by up to 350%. This is obviously a great innovation, so he calls up a former Business professor from college and gets into contact with a manufacturer. The manufacturer makes the man come in and present his design to the board of directors, so they schedule a meeting in two weeks.

At the meeting, the board is blown away. The manβs charisma, design, and equations all point to a massive innovation in shipping. The company is poised to make a huge profit. Construction starts immediately.

On his flight back, the man happens to sits next to his old buddy from high school, Jimmy. Jimmy tells the man that he has just blown the farming world wide open. His new GMO potato produces five times as much energy and has been the talk of the world. Jimmy says that all the news outlets have been reporting potatoes to be the next big superfood, and his design is poised to make him millions, if not billions of dollars. Jimmy pitches the man for the entire plane ride, and convinced him. They hop on the next flight back to visit the board of directors once again. The board is shocked. Both ideas stand to make billions of dollars for the company, but there is one slight problem.

The CEO says to the man, βwe know you have these two ideas. However, we can only allocate enough resources to make one of them profitable. I recommend you take some time off and really decide which of these ideas you want our company to produce. We can schedule a meeting in a few weeks if that works for you.β

The man says right back to the CEO, βIβm going to take a walk and clear my head. This is a big decisionβ and walks right out of the room.

Not even five seconds later the man comes back into the room and says βIβve made my decision. Letβs go with the shipping method.β This shocks the CEO, who says βare you sure?? This is a billion dollar decision and you only took five seconds to think about it.β

The man looks back at him and says βwell, in this business time is moneyβ so I decided to make my decision schooner rather than taterβ

E = m Β· si Β²

Nobody expects the Spanish in equation.

I took a math book on a survival camping trip to the Arctic

I learned two things, quadratic equations, and warm ups are not what I had thought.

Science Puns

One of the funniest school puns; **science puns**

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK. If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, theyβd be alloys.

The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.

If youβre not part of the solution, youβre part of the precipitate.

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, βNo, Iβm traveling light.β

Did you just mutate for a stop codon? Because youβre talking nonsense!

How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.

What did Gregor Mendel say when he founded genetics? Woopea!

Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? Heβs 0K now.

I wish I was adenine, then, I could get paired with U.

Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says βI think Iβll have an H2O.β The second one says βI think Iβll have an H2O tooβ β and he died.

A couple of biologists had twins. They named one Jessica and the other Control.

Did you hear the one about the recycling triplets? Their names are Polly, Ethel, and Ian.

Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!

What element is a girlβs future best friend? Carbon.

I had to make these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.

Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.

What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.

What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? I like your βstyle.β

Iβm reading a great book on anti-gravity. I canβt put it down.

I have a new theory on inertia but it doesnβt seem to be gaining momentum.

Why canβt atheists solve exponential equations? Because they donβt believe in higher powers.

Schrodingerβs cat walks into a bar. And doesnβt.

Do you know the name Pavlov? It rings a bell.

What does a subatomic duck say? Quark!

A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a beer. Bartender replies βFor you, no chargeβ.

Two atoms are walking along. One of them says: βOh, no, I think I lost an electron.β βAre you sure?β

βYe

... keep reading on reddit β‘My dad asking about Nascar

Dad: So which way do the cars go around the track in Nascar?

Me: I'm pretty sure they go counter-clockwise.

Dad: Yea, in the North Hemisphere, they go clockwise south of the equator, right?

On topic: Celebrity Attractiveness

So, my parents were talking about whether a celebrity (who's name I didn't manage to catch) was attractive or not.

Mum: "Yeah, she's attractive, but she's a bit bipolar though" Dad: "That's okay just take her to the equator, and she'll be fine."

Son asks for help with his science homework. Nerd dad strikes!

Son: "Dad, I having trouble solving problems about solubility. Can you help me?"

Me: "Sure. It is pretty simple, actually. All you need to do is plug the numbers from the problems into the right equations. Then, you can figure out the solutions."

[META]Could we please get the non-dadjoke puns out of here?

I've seen a steady increase of non-dadjoke puns in this sub over the last few months. It seems that people equate dadjokes with puns, which is not correct. Go to /r/puns for that. This comment by /u/skeptickal is a great explanation of the origins of dad jokes.

I do realize that it's hard or impossible to create a written rule of what is and what isn't a dadjoke, but whoever's moderating this subreddit should know.

If the world's human population joined hands around the equator...

A significant portion of them would drown...

I came across this equation on my chemistry test - C2H6O...

Looks like I have an alcohol problem.

I came across this equation on my chemistry test - C2H6O...

Looks like I got a problem with alcohol.

Why can't atheists solve exponential equations>

Because they don't believe in higher powers.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.