Al Gebra
Multi-ply
Al-Gebra
Looks like I have an alcohol problem.
at equal distance from each other,
...
most of them would get wet and some will surely drown
He heard it involved axes.
I told him I'm no simp.
I don't know guys.
That’s when I draw the line.
I just can't figure it out.
Because Watt and Euler don't mix.
Logorithmic
He was charged with manufacturing crystal math.
Crosses the line.
But it’s only adding to the problem
You remove the S
Eeek! = MC Scared
A significant portion of them would drown
My dad worked in construction for most of his life, and because he worked with his hands, he sacrificed many watches. But if you don't have a watch, how are you to tell time? My dad has a great sense of humor and is always thinking of new ways to do things to make them more practical or thinking of ways to change things to make them work better for him. So after spending way too much money on a heavy duty watch that inevitably broke on him, he came up with a better solution.
He used the working part of a clock and stuck it on the inside rim of his hat, so if he wanted to know what the time was, he just had to look up. Simple. And the way his hat was, you couldn't see the clock when looking at him unless you were underneath him and looking up.
And then came the funny part. Every time he was asked what time it was, he would look up at the sun, scan the horizon, pretend to do a math equation in his head, and tell them the exact time down to the minute. I've witnessed him doing this a few times but never gave it away. The look of surprise and confusion this gave people was priceless.
My dad had done other funny things like this, but this was by far the funniest.
I will calc U later!
Call 1-800-[(10x)(ln(13e))]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]
Because they do not believe in higher powers.
"What's the equation? (occasion)"
The quackdratic equation.
bonus:
What is a duck's favorite restaurant? quacker barrel.
Tropecal!
A root of squares.
I'll calcu-LATER!
An algebraille equation.
Now it's just beer.
An Al Gore-rhythm
http://imgur.com/a/IXCKw
Down near the equator I easily Madagascar
A young man comes up with a great idea for a new shipping method. He designs everything himself, hires people to create models, and deduces that he can use old fashioned boating technology to increase shipping speeds by up to 350%. This is obviously a great innovation, so he calls up a former Business professor from college and gets into contact with a manufacturer. The manufacturer makes the man come in and present his design to the board of directors, so they schedule a meeting in two weeks.
At the meeting, the board is blown away. The man’s charisma, design, and equations all point to a massive innovation in shipping. The company is poised to make a huge profit. Construction starts immediately.
On his flight back, the man happens to sits next to his old buddy from high school, Jimmy. Jimmy tells the man that he has just blown the farming world wide open. His new GMO potato produces five times as much energy and has been the talk of the world. Jimmy says that all the news outlets have been reporting potatoes to be the next big superfood, and his design is poised to make him millions, if not billions of dollars. Jimmy pitches the man for the entire plane ride, and convinced him. They hop on the next flight back to visit the board of directors once again. The board is shocked. Both ideas stand to make billions of dollars for the company, but there is one slight problem.
The CEO says to the man, “we know you have these two ideas. However, we can only allocate enough resources to make one of them profitable. I recommend you take some time off and really decide which of these ideas you want our company to produce. We can schedule a meeting in a few weeks if that works for you.”
The man says right back to the CEO, “I’m going to take a walk and clear my head. This is a big decision” and walks right out of the room.
Not even five seconds later the man comes back into the room and says “I’ve made my decision. Let’s go with the shipping method.” This shocks the CEO, who says “are you sure?? This is a billion dollar decision and you only took five seconds to think about it.”
The man looks back at him and says “well, in this business time is money— so I decided to make my decision schooner rather than tater”
Nobody expects the Spanish in equation.
I learned two things, quadratic equations, and warm ups are not what I had thought.
I've seen a steady increase of non-dadjoke puns in this sub over the last few months. It seems that people equate dadjokes with puns, which is not correct. Go to /r/puns for that. This comment by /u/skeptickal is a great explanation of the origins of dad jokes.
I do realize that it's hard or impossible to create a written rule of what is and what isn't a dadjoke, but whoever's moderating this subreddit should know.
Looks like I have an alcohol problem.
Al-gebra
Looks like I got a problem with alcohol.
A significant portion of them would drown...
Because they don't believe in higher powers.
