Enlistments Puns

He wanted to overwhelm the enemy by shear numbers.

He was their Grill Sergeant.

I mean, there's a reason they called it the INFANTry.

I just came up with joke and thought I would test the waters:

Aquaman has been ruling Atlantis for a number of years and finally finds himself bored with the straight and narrow path. He decides he'll commit a crime to shake things up a bit and enlists the help of one of his sea creature friends to be his getaway.

Although his crime is fairly minor, he's still caught and taken to jail. His wife comes to bail him out and asks the officer what he actually did.

"He was illegally parked, ma'am," the officer replies.

"Seriously? Why didn't you just ticket him?"

"That wasn't the issue. The problem was that he did it on porpoise."

I'm taking a new job and moving to a new state. I throw out dad jokes whenever I can. I want to leave our work group chat with a great send off. What's your worst, but funniest dad joke?

I came home for a weekend and my mother was catching me up on some current events in the family.

Her: Oh yeah, your cousin has enlisted in the Navy and he's going to training pretty soon.

Me: Wow, how does the family feel about that?

Her: What do you mean?

Me: Well, are they... pause... All aboard with the idea?

both can't contain laughter

Everyone in my family is witty and we all love dad jokes so we always have a good time around the dinner table.

They were just made to be broken

(My brother who is a new father and newly enlisted solider told me this today)

A Call to Arms A Plead to the Limbless

The Armless are a stump among society and could easily achieve more. It’s bothersome that somebody with great potential could allow themselves to lose grip of what they aspire for. The radius of support and development that surrounds these people is astounding. Yet they bite the hand that feeds and throw away opportunities. With each passing day they are crippled by the errors in their ways. Not only are they not properly handling the situation, they are doing a disservice to society. Most will say to refrain from pointing fingers, but it is pertinent that we show them their faults.
All aside we should most certainly not try to elbow my way into their lives. However, if they were to branch off into their own progressive groups it would be most beneficial. And severance is a good thing between them and the public. This doesn't mean a complete amputation of them from society. Perhaps selective assistance will help these people find a well fitted sleeve within their communities. This process is difficult and lending a helping hand can make the difference. On the other hand, we have those who don’t try to succeed. Their negligence is worthy of more than a mere slap on the wrist. When somebody refuses to apply themselves, they are holding back progress. By giving themselves mental limitation they are creating a prosthetic disability they must abide by. The majority of working to achieve goals is believing you can reach out and grab them. But, somebody who gives up is cutting themselves short of success Seeing somebody give up is the furthest thing from being humerus. Urging these people is a necessity, otherwise they will never try their hardest, encourage them to use some elbow grease and put forth full effort. Any small contribution is better than being a detriment, community service, obtaining greater education, enlisting in the armed forces, these all benefit society. Drastic changes of this scale are sure to cause discontent, grab a tissue if need be, but never give up. For all those that are currently wasting away without contribution, it's time to limb’er up and take charge.

Both "draft" as in compulsory enlistment and "draft" as in a gust of wind or cold air.