Watch out! r/puns is in danger

r/punpatrol

r/punKGB

r/Pun_Internal_Affairs

r/punspecialforces

These are the names of our oppressors! There may be more, but they are our greatest threat. They are currently amassing an army to try to end puns as we know it.

If we are to save this beautiful form of our language, than we must unite! We must not divide ourselves by titles, but unite ourselves as punners!

They plan on eradicating all puns by going to the source, the pun user. Are we to let ourselves be undermined by those who think they are better than us? Are we to let ourselves and all future generations be banned from puns? If you say no, then join in the revolt

##VIVA LA R/PUNS

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SkyThunderStorm22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What starts with T, ends with T, and is full of T?

Teapot

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lvrcerosis
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
It doesn’t matter if you’re tall, short, fat, thin, rich, poor, at the end of the day....

It’s night

πŸ‘︎ 227
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VaughnSD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What starts with 'O' and ends with 'nions' and sometimes make you cry?

Opinions.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1963Jan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
2020 can’t end

Because we’d be admitting 2021.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/T_fiki
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Never hear the end of it
πŸ‘︎ 611
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toe-knail
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I can’t believe people are still making β€œFriends” references 15 years after the show ended.

No one told me life was gonna be this way.

πŸ‘︎ 173
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
We can’t allow this year to end...

That would be admitting that 2021

πŸ‘︎ 135
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jraikin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
A dead end
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcnigel73
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
There is a group of people that always ends things...

Finnish.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FuryOfHell
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I just ended a 5 year old relationship.

Good thing it wasn't mine.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
How do chickens end there shift’s

They cluck out

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AshamedTurtwig
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
The Trump Presidency didn't end with a bang...

...but with a WI/MI/PA!

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GoodChadAndUgly
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Some guy on a tractor keeps driving past my house shouting, β€œTHE END IS NIGH!!! THE END IS NIGH!!!”

It might be farmer Geddon.

πŸ‘︎ 184
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I’m thinking of a word. Starts with P and doesn’t have an ending

it’s Pi

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MINECRAFT-BEE7
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that if you took the Eiffel Tower apart and laid each piece end to end...

you could go to jail for a very long time?

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife and I went out for dinner and ended up with food poisoning. She ate some bad chicken and got salmonella

while I ate some bad salmon and got chickenella.

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Beezneez86
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
We cannot allow this year to end

That would be admitting 2021

[Edit] Thank you so much for the awards and upvotes!

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What starts with a W and ends with a T.

It does, I swear.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OliPark
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Two drunk guys were fighting. One of them drew a line in the dirt, and said if the other crossed it they would punch them in the face.

That was the punchline.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/i_am_dan17
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Todays election will end by 6:00 pm.

This can only be achieved if one 'Trumps' the other then they should be done 'Biden'.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PoopsMcWillie
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Parked outside my favourite restaurant and ended up with a parking ticket...

Fined dining.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
The U.K. lockdown is going to end...

in tiers.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trendfoll
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
🚨︎ report
No T.V. show producers want to hire me any more because I end up getting every show I show up on canceled.

I’m a serial killer.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mush_Tilly
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I accidentally stepped on my cats tail. The cat jumped, and I ended up kicking the table pretty hard. β€œOuch!” I yelled

β€œYOU, ow?” The cat replied in disbelief. β€œME-ow”

πŸ‘︎ 130
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πŸ‘€︎ u/keller_rado
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
And this is the way it ends
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/luckytoothpick
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Was watching a shark movie, when suddenly it ended unexpectedly

β€˜Fin’

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
A rope walks into a bar. The bartender looks up and says says, β€œGet out. We don’t serve rope in here.” So the rope goes out, cuts itself in two before tying the two sections together. It then pulls out a comb and combs its ends. The rope then walks back into the bar.

The bartender says, β€œHey! Aren’t you the rope that I just threw out?”

The rope replied, β€œNo. I’m a frayed knot.”

πŸ‘︎ 12k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
🚨︎ report
U2
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LeoCurre2038
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
We should have known this year was gonna suck. We were never gonna end the year as winners. The writing was on the wall. At the end of the year, we should have known we'd be facing the truth-

2021

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/krigito
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I liked the Frozen movie ending...

It was warm and well thawed out.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/okayprobably
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
🚨︎ report
The end.
πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrValdez
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
🚨︎ report
We have a joke calendar and we missed this week, my wife was having me guess the answers and we ended up accidentally creating this gem: what do you call a cow that was just born?

A mooborn!

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Singular1st
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I secretly don't want 2020 the end..

Because then it'd mean 2021.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shawnshaunseans
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What starts with P and ends with ORN?

Popcorn!

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MGreenMN
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Only this morning I learned my high end toaster isn't waterproof

.....I was shockedπŸ™„

πŸ‘︎ 68
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πŸ‘€︎ u/socdist
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Kenny Rodgers ended up in a wheelchair after an accident. While rolling down the side walk, he lost a wheel.

He sung: you picked a fine time to leave me, loose wheel.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkSideDweller
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What does a robot do at the end of a one-night stand?

He nuts and bolts!

Edit: wow! My first Silver. You guys are amazing.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedRocketMan_Y
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
🚨︎ report
High school started out promising for me, but I ended up selling meat as a job.

I guess you can say I butchered my grades.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hamz000
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I just realized nothing starts with "n" and ends with "g"

Go ahead, prove me wrong

πŸ‘︎ 360
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Photoshoppin_Boi
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Spend your last dollar on a $0.98 lottery ticket and see what you end up with.

That's just my two cents.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ryanooooo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What starts with P and ends with ORN, and is the best part of the movie industry?

Popcorn

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cosh1990
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
It doesn't matter if you're tall, short, fat, thin, rich, poor, at the end of the day....

It's night.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/i_am_dan17
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What starts, ends, and has T in the middle?

A teapot!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kgangadhar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What starts with T, ends with T, and is full of T?

A teapot.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
We cannot allow this year to end!

That would be admitting that 2021.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mywifeh8sme
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report

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