Phil
Go post NSFW jokes somewhere else. If I can't tell my kids this joke, then it is not a DAD JOKE.
If you feel it's appropriate to share NSFW jokes with your kids, that's on you. But a real, true dad joke should work for anyone's kid.
Mods... If you exist... Please, stop this madness. Rule #6 should simply not allow NSFW or (wtf) NSFL tags. Also, remember that MINORS browse this subreddit too? Why put that in rule #6, then allow NSFW???
Please consider changing rule #6. I love this sub, but the recent influx of NSFW tagged posts that get all the upvotes, just seem wrong when there are good solid DAD jokes being overlooked because of them.
Thank you,
A Dad.
Well, toucan play at that game.
Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.
They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.
I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.
Sudden Lee
She said apple-lutely
Windows
'Eye-do'
This is my first post pls don't kill me lol.
The people in the comment section is why I love this subreddit!!
Cred once again my sis wants credit lol
Keep in mind, my son is 4 years old, so everything is an original to him.
I had to work late into the evening yesterday, and he was just going to bed when I got home. I had left home for the office nearly 14 hours prior, had a long day, lots of meetings, traffic, etc.
When I walked through the door, I was exhausted, run down, and starving. My wife hugged me and asked how my day was, and I replied, "Done. It was a good day, but has got me exhausted. I just want to grab a bite and go to bed. I'm hungry."
From my son's bedroom, I hear him shout, "Hi Hungry! Nice to meet you!"
Not only did it make me laugh, but I completely forgot about how hungry and tired I was. I went to his bedroom, and we laughed together about it. It was exactly what I needed.
Edit: Thanks for all the awards, kind strangers! I'll let my son know y'all enjoyed his joke too!
I heard parents named their children lance a lot.
First post please don't kill me
Edit: i went to sleep and now my inbox is dead, thank you kind strangers for the awards!
Japan.
it's Hans free now..
second hand stores!
Old Neeeeiiiiighvy
10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too
A buck-an-ear!
I Thank ye kind Matey for the booty! I be truly overwhelmed! Thank you!
Holy cow! Thank you everyone for the upvotes and awards! I wasn’t expecting this!
and not:
He should have a good vowel movement. His next diaper change could spell disaster though.
That was the punchline
Making it all the way home and realizing that they forgot one of the containers:
Riceless
It’s for Hispanic attacks
Without missing a beat he asks "Daddy, do you know how much room you need to grow Fungi like that?"
I did not know.
So he tells me "as Mushroom as possible!"
So proud.
Feyonce
He was so brave and even tried to encourage us, the family around him, with his last breaths. He kept whispering to us to Be Positive.
He said, “Change the batteries in your hearing aid”.
She was pretty mad when I only picked seven up
So far no one has given me a straight answer.
TLDR: It has recently come to my attention that IUD fit is a major issue, particularly for women that haven’t given birth. If nonspecific pelvic pain (including cramp-y/muscle spasm-y pain associated with orgasms) is part of your particular brand of suffering - and you have an IUD - I strongly urge you to talk to your gyno about getting a 3D ultrasound done to determine if your IUD might be contributing to your issue. Specifically - have them measure the width of your uterus to see if it’s smaller than the width of your IUD (32 mm for larger ones like Mirena and 28 mm for smaller ones like Skyla). I had one for 7 years (!) and it wasn’t until getting it replaced this year and feeling like something wasn’t right that I insisted on further imaging - only to be told (eventually after jumping through several hoops and dealing with condescending doctors) that my uterus was way too small and I never should have had one in the first place.
TO BE CLEAR - This is not a cure-all (see below for more info) but one more thing that could be investigated to possibly give you some relief.
My story
Like many of us in this group, my issues started after my first (culture confirmed) UTI - then I had a bunch of UTIs (despite being crazy careful) - then UTI-like symptoms with negative cultures. Around this time (2011, 2012) I was diagnosed with probable IC - but it was still kind of the dark ages for this condition and it wasn’t until much later that I got good symptom control (mine are primarily urgency/frequency) with a combination of allergy meds/urogesic blue/muscle relaxers/pelvic floor exercises/dietary adjustments.
In 2013/2014, it was becoming more apparent in the literature that people with migraine with aura (raises hand) have an increased stroke risk - and independently, people that take birth control with estrogen also have an increased stroke risk. Put together, it was recommended that women with migraine with aura steer clear of BC options that include estrogen - which severely limits options. I was told basically the best options are the mini-pill (progesterone only) or an IUD. I opted for the IUD as a) my memory is garbage and no way was I going to want the stress of a pill you have to take right on time every single day and b) it seemed ideal in terms of effective pregnancy prevention rates (and also no more periods yay!).
I had my Mirena IUD placed in the summer of 2014 at Planned Parenthood. Placement pain was above a 10/10 - like guys
... keep reading on reddit ➡Alzheimer, Grandma, it's Alzheimer.
You look for the fresh prints!
