If Abraham Lincoln had gone on a hunger strike there would have been an Emaciation Proclamation.

Emaciation/Emancipation

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📅︎ Nov 20 2020
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Got a co-worker with this one as he was heading home after a 24hr shift.

I work in the investigations section of a military police department, and aside from our normal office hours, we have 24hr shifts that cycle through the office, so that there's an investigator present and on-duty 24/7/365.

My co-worker was wrapping up some paperwork this morning, and coming off of his 24 hr shift, and almost dead to the world. At the time, a pair of other investigators in my office were discussing some case that had happened a day or two prior that involved an emancipated juvenile.

I was just logging into my workstation to check my e-mail and I turned to my co-worker and asked, "Hey, so when a juvenile gets emancipated, and he announces it - proclaims it, if you will - what would they call that?"

He stares at me with a blank, uncomprehending expression and I continue, "An emancipation...proclamation? Maybe?"

The annoyed groans of someone who's been up for 24 hours are so satisfying.

👍︎ 846
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👤︎ u/Droidball
📅︎ Jul 08 2015
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What's the difference between a Crow and a Raven?

Well you see, a Crow has 4 pinion feathers on their wings while a Raven has only 3. So really, it's just a matter of a pinion.

👍︎ 809
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👤︎ u/Miko93
📅︎ May 27 2013
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What do you call Abe Lincolns poo?

A Lincoln log

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📅︎ May 16 2017
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