They’ve just discovered an Egyptian tomb filled with chocolate and hazelnuts

They believe it’s the tomb of Pharaoh Rocher

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pathrado
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2021
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Did you know if you and your buddy fart at the same time it makes you Egyptian?

Because you have a Tutankhamun.

Note:I thought of this today I really hope the joke lands.

πŸ‘︎ 508
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TLEToyu
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2021
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An ancient Egyptian king and his subjects had nearly the same farts...

They had a toot-in-common

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CryptoReaper5
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2021
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What do you call a gassy old Egyptian?

Tootin’ common.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kasonjing
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2021
🚨︎ report
Where did elderly ancient Egyptians gather?

In the great pyramid of geezer

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Muppet_Cartel
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
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When do Egyptians go mad?

When they senile.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andtosumitup
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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A new Egyptian undertakers have opened up in town. Their motto....

"Satisfaction Guaranteed....Or Your Mummy Back."

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
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Did you know ancient Egyptian houses didn’t have a door knocker?

Instead they had a horn and a sign saying β€œToot and come in”

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bishcraft1979
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Why are Egyptians such great businessmen?

Because they're great at pyramid schemes!

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lesbianqueen7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
🚨︎ report
What ancient Egyptian pharaoh never farted?

King Toot-Uncommon

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2021
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What do you call an Egyptian physical therapist?

A Cairo-practor

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anonymouspapayaz
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2021
🚨︎ report
If I were an Egyptian pharaoh...

My name would be Tootsarecommon...

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jmfinfrock
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2021
🚨︎ report
There's been talk that the ancient Egyptians invented cement.

Historians have looked into the ruins for evidence, but there's nothing concrete.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
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What did the Egyptian crocodile do with the problems in his life?

Nothing, he lived in da-nile

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Breachx4002
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you know that archeologists discovered ancient Egyptians watched monster movies?

Moth-Ra was their favorite.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2021
🚨︎ report
What do Egyptian Pharaoh's and sandwich filling have in common?

They're both in bread.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Highway-Amazing
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
🚨︎ report
What does an Egyptian goose say?

Ankh, ankh!

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Remember the band that did that rock cover of β€œwalk like an Egyptian’ by The Bangles?

Pharaohsmith.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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Ancient Egyptian architect: "Do you know how to build a pyramid?"

Ancient Egyptian builder: "Well, err yeah, upto a point."

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
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Anyone have any Egyptian jokes?

I am in a roasting war and in need of assistance.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sgper18
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
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I finally went to talk to the super cute girl who works in the Egyptian super market.

Her: What can I do for you?

Me: I'm looking for a date.

Her: Oh, what kind of dates?

Me: Uhmm, just dinner and a movie :)

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gliscor_dude
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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Egyptian pie
πŸ‘︎ 138
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SethGrimly
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What do Egyptian bus drivers buy when they crash?

ANUBUS

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/obenssonosias
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked a Marine if he knew about Egyptian gods.

He said, β€œwho, ra?”

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vehiclesales
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Egyptians claimed to have invented the guitar,

But they were such lyres.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Russell_Pinto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
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When are Egyptian fishermen less likely to believe what their are told? /r/Jokes/comments/km3t07/…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/badaloop
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when two ancient Egyptians fart at the same time?

Toot in common

πŸ‘︎ 149
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HoldMyDirrk
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the egyptians have trouble with acceptance?

Because the were in de-Nile.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Reader91-
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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What happens when the vehicle carrying most of the Egyptian gods breaks down?

They have to pull over and wait for Anubis.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Foxadelick
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What was the name of the Egyptian that was buried with chocolate and nuts?

Pharaoh Rocher

πŸ‘︎ 391
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πŸ‘€︎ u/evac95
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
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My wife told me she is thinking about selling Egyptian rocks.

It sounds like a pyramid scheme to me

πŸ‘︎ 76
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Egyptian Council Leader: the public transport in Cairo is terrible.

Egyptian Transport Secretary: We need a new bus

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vbloke
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What did Margaret Attwood title her latest murder mystery novel, about an Egyptian serial killer who kept drowning people?

The Nile-ist

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buttengine
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I have two college friends who studied ancient Egyptian plumbing.

They were pharaoh faucet majors.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DragonHeinie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear they just diacovered an Egyptian mummy that was covered in chocolate and hazelnuts?

It's a pharaoh rocher.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OliPark
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the two gassy Egyptians become friends?

Because they had a toot-in-common

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/heybuddy313
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
An ancient Egyptian queen with an especially flat chest was recently discovered.

Nevertiti.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do Egyptian riverboat captains tend to be flat-earthers?

Because they live in da Nile.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trippy-puppy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
🚨︎ report
The Egyptian government has asked Cairo’s taxi drivers to drive around and sound their horns in the hope that familiar sounds will help calm the residents following the pandemic.

Operation Toot And Calm β€˜Em will last a week.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vbloke
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
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Why did the Egyptian man wrongfully insist that he was still on land?

He was in de-nile

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LooseMonty
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an Egyptian that believes life is meaningless?

A nileist

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/N64GC
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I was having some back issues, so I went to my Egyptian friend

He's a cairopractor

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PopeShashcan49
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an Egyptian doctor?

A Cairo-practor

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/schiggy182
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the Egyptian crocodile do about the problems in his life?

Nothing. He lived in de-nile.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nonions
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when two Egyptians fart at the same time?

Tutankhamen

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/awesometoenails
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report

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