What a grand start to the weekend.
The dot "."
It has ended more sentences than anything else.
They keep the baahhhhhd germs out.
Cold turkey
Personally, I think it’s nuts.
Word of mouth
Because actions speak louder than words.
He was a one-hilt wonder.
A heat-seeking hittle
Our milk lasts the rest of this decade!
Me: Let me see your fan.
Friend: *shows me fan*
Me: I'm much bigger than that. Some might even say your biggest...
Friend: I need you to leave.
Because they are cross hares.
It's great for missed erection!
Go out in the woods and dig a large hole about 6 or 7 feet deep. Fill it with ashes and put peas around the outside of the it.
When a bear comes to take a pea, kick him in the ash hole.
I was sure we’d be sitting ducks.
He always has his Jason.
They need their quarter back
Everyone wants to save a buck!
Son...."Dad have you seen my Beats headphones"? Dad...."Beats me"! Son....eye rolling on his way out of my room. Wife..."Really"?
Hi
Low
Out of all the random passersby, nobody's caught me yet.
So i heard this joke the other day, quite shit really but it has since become the joke i tell to everyone
Here goes....
What is red and smells like blue paint!?
Red paint!!!
Personally, I think it’s nuts
