A list of puns related to "Diversions"
I just visited their wireless section and didn't see a single LG BT device
Because of Thai-version..
π Don't hate me..π
it was a vibrant egosystem.
A sonic boomer.
But white people are all the colors combined.
Because of all the cultures
Tolkienism
She said, "I see Indian people all the time." I replied "You must have a Sikh Sense."
Diversion
"Why are they called right whales"
"Because they all left?", I responded
For some background: Right whales are an endangered species and they are called right whales because they was the right whale to hunt.
EDIT: The reaction of my professor was her dropping her head in embarrassment with a smile. Some groans and laughter were had among the students
Long post is long:
Her: Remember dad's tomato bushes? Well they're attacking! At least one is leaning across the path trying to get at my window... We had the war of the roses, now its time for the attack of the tomatoes!
Me: I don't remember anything about tomato bushes. From one battle to the next.
Her: Yep! Lookout tomatoes here comes the chutney recipe!
Me: I can just imagine a cucumber campaign. Operation onion would be next, which will fail, causing everyone to cry. Dill Day follows, a great success for the allied gardeners. All too soon though, the kamikaze carrots set in, utterly ruining the radish raid. The mushroom maneuver is employed, saving the troops, allowing them to deal the final blow in the asparagus assault!
Her: Don't forget the pumpkins want to supply ground cover with heavy support...
Me: Ah yes, the pumpkin paratroopers.
Her: Thyme is running out...
Me: Prepare the beetroot bombs!!!
Her: Aim for Potato Garden!
Me: Fire the capsicum! Deploy the celery team!
Her: Bring in the egg plant division to support the capsicum!
Me: This is it boys, life or dirt! I want a passionfruit unit to find us a vantage point, and the strawberry unit to surround them!
Her: We had better bring the lettuce up to date!
Me: The cabbage are under withering fire, we need support from the raspberry division! The potatoes are mashed, so well need to send the zucchini in their place!
Her: The zucchini can't take that heavy fire, they'll be grated. Send spinach for some extra iron. The sweet potatoes are digging in at the ridge.
Me: Prepare the watermelon bomb, we need to finish this! The eggplant were squashed, deploy the broccoli brigade! The beans need to get out of there, or they'll be split!
Her: Cauliflowers are going in to retrieve the beans. How brave to risk their florets!
The corn commandos are deployed, but the artichokes are all out of heart, we need to boost morale.
Me: The leeks are down! They'll be flattened if we don't do something!
Are the spinach still operational?
Her: Too bad the pepper isn't on our side, they're well seasoned troops.
Spinach is a go!
Nothing has touched it...
Me: But wait! We still have the chillies to give them heavy fire!
Her: And the squashes and peas!
Me: The ginger is holding it's ground, but it's being cut down by the pineapple!
The basil should make things interesting, send them to aid the potatoes.
**Her:
... keep reading on reddit β‘I've just finished my final paper on Starbucks, Diversity, and Excellence Theory. My professor loves witty titles, but my brain is mush. Suggestions? I can't espresso how much it will help me. Thanks a latte.
Thanks everyone! I loved all of your responses. I titled my paper Brewing Effective Public Relations: Excellence in Diversity at Starbucks.
Grabbing some white rice, yellow rice, and some brown rice along the way.
Daughter asks "Why are you getting some of each?"
"'Cos I'm all about ricial diversity."
My dad would always make up a reason to apologize to pretty women, no matter what the setting was.
Dad: "sorry about that."
Pretty Lady: "oh, you're fine"
Dad, nonchalant shrug: "thanks, I appreciate compliments"
Reactions were diverse, and often uncomfortable, but every time he walked away chuckling.
Just saw this on facebook...
A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. The following day she was being interviewed by a local TV station, and the commentator asked about what it felt to be married again at that age and would she share part of her previous experiences, since it seem quite unique the fact that her new husband was a βfuneral director.β After a short time to think, a smile came to her face and she proudly explained that she had first married a banker when she was in her twenties, in her forties she married a circus ring master, and in her sixties she married a pastor and now in her eighties, a funeral director. The amazed commentator asked her why she had married men with such diverse carriers. With a smile on her face she explained, βI married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.β
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.