What do you call an amusement park ride that's completely made out of iron?

A Ferrous Wheel! :D

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fafnir_19
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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A family is in an amusement park and comes across an animatronic display of Al Gore playing the drums.

The mother says, "Hey everyone, look at that. Isn't that amazing?" The father, unimpressed, replies, "It's just an algorithm".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mgrasso75
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
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Is this amusement-park big wheel made of iron?

Yes. It's a ferrous wheel

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sawrce
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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What is Ironman’s favorite ride at the amusement park?

The Ferrous Wheel!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andeargdue
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
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Me (feeling discomfort while at a North Atlantic bird-themed amusement park):

"Well, this is Auk-World...."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pj566
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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How do you know an amusement park isn't fake?

When you see the ferris wheel.

(Made this joke after a 10 minute argument with my 5 year old niece. She pointed out the ferris wheel and I kept saying "I know... the fair is real.")

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFifthStep
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
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At amusement parks, when the line splits, we never pick the right line.

We always go left.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/masterzeus2
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
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Did you ever hear of the girl who got dumper at the amusement park?

It was an emotional roller coaster

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigggdaddie
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2018
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My friends were arguing about which roller coaster to go on next at the amusement park. When they asked for my opinion, I told them I didn't care.

I was just along for the rides.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBuccaneer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2017
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Dad jokes at the old amusement park.

First day of summer vacation, pack up the family and bring them to Canobie Lake Park, a local amusement park.

We all get on the Ferris Wheel and the listen to the instructions:

Operator: "Please keep you arms and legs in the cart at all times, remain seated until the ride comes to a complete stop and please NO ROCKING!"

Me: "Awwww man, I was just abut to crank some AC/DC"

My family and the family in line behind us: ::audible groans::

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MikeTheBum
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2016
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The Foo Fighters should have their own amusement park ride called the "Rockin' Grohlercoaster"

I just picture Dave Grohl riding the coaster car in his throne with his leg in a cast rocking out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tubachris85x
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2016
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Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the amusement park?

He sued them for funfair dismissal.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wizzix
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2017
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Taking a car load of kids to amusement park today. One kid screams "Please tell me that's Knott's Berry Farm." ...

I reply, "It's Knott."

Kids in unison "Awww."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Papa-Dam
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2016
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Saw a guy riding an amusement park ride alone today.

I wonder if he still said "weeee!", or if he said "meeee!" instead.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/igdfr
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2016
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At an amusement park when I was younger

Me: Come on Dad, pick up the pace!

dad: Why? Did you drop it?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tetraporc
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2013
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BREAKING: The Supreme Court ruled in favor of Dad Jokes.

They deemed it cool and amusable pun-ishment

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πŸ‘€︎ u/clifwith1f
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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Wife asked for popcorn. She was not amused.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Shaken
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
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My wife went into labor today, so I read the front page of /r/DadJokes to her as a distraction from the pain. Unfortunately, she didn’t laugh once, was clearly not amused and I have no idea why...

It must have been the delivery...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
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DadHelp wanted: more variants for "interrupting cow" knock-knock joke to amuse kids

Everyone knows the interrupting cow knock knock joke but we like making up KKJs for other cows. Here are some of ours; please add more so I can continue to surprise and delight the young people near and dear to me. TIA!

(Obviously each joke goes "Knock knock" etc. I'll just write the "cow" part and the punchline)

  • French cow: le moo

  • Backwards cow: oom

  • Upside down cow: woo

  • Sad cow: moo hoo hoo

  • Ghost cow: moo-oo-oo-oooo

  • Police cow: moo ee oo ee oo ee oo

  • Cow on a motorbike: (make zooming moo)

  • Cow in disguise: Baa

  • Horse in disguise: Moo

  • Invisible cow: (quickly cover child's eyes) Moo

  • Inaudible cow:

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πŸ‘€︎ u/A2S2020
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
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Nintendo puns
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πŸ‘€︎ u/piano_043
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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I just bought a dictionary today and bought it home to find out that all the pages were blank.

I have no words to describe how angry I am.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
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He was... not amused lol
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lunatoons291
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2020
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What do you call an amusing, mushroom-looking person?

A fun guy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fakt_adolf
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2020
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When is door not a door?

When it's ajar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/guitarguy12341
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
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My Wife told our kids they need to get their acts together.

I asked if it would be ok if they gathered their swords instead. She was not amused.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ranyave
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
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While my wife was in labor I read her jokes to distract her from the pain, but she didn’t seem amused...

I guess it was the delivery!

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
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My wife asked me to help her wrap presents...

So I started doing my best human beatbox impersonation.

"Yo! Yo! Presents in da hizzzzzzz!"

She wasn't as amused as I was.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/breakone9r
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
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The society is not amused
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_joeri
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2019
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Filling out a report at work... and finding ways to amuse myself while doing so
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HumusGoose
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2019
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When my wife was having our baby, I tried to distract her by telling Dad jokes. She wasn’t amused.

Must have been the delivery.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2018
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When I found out crayola had a amusment park I was colerfuly suprised.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFlom
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
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What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TehFuzziest
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
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While my wife was in labor, I told her jokes to distract her from the pain, but she wasn't amused…

It must have been the delivery…

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2017
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Just came up with this joke for my roommate, she was not amused.

What do you call a stone with eyes?

Roxy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BinaryPeach
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2019
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She wasn’t very amused
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xJacon
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2018
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I need help from all the dads out there...

You are tasked with making an advertisement for an amusement park, however you want to make it to STOP people from coming to the carnival... I'm curious to see your advertisements, also try to keep the jokes under 50 words.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brilliance79
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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I wasn't amused when my friend stole my equivalent trigonometric expressions

Identity theft is not a joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GuyInFridge
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2019
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If my kid is easily amused with a mirror, does that mean he will self distract?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fightmilk22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2018
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My roommate ran out of buns and used the last of my flatbreads for his breakfast this morning. He didn't find my response amusing.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/imnotwitty
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2014
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My wife sometimes has trouble thinking of the right word for things. This morning, she asked me "what's it called when you have no bars?" Without missing a beat, I told her...

"Prohibition." She wasn't as amused as I was, I'm afraid.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EngineersAnon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
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I used to work at the calendar factory

... but was fired for taking a couple of days off!

Not unknown, but a fave. I also wanted to say I became a certified dad today! I plan on utilizing this sub to torture my new child.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EridonMan
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
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A guy walks into the office

I ask for his name. He says it’s Dasani. I said, ”water you here for?” He didn’t look amused. I said, β€œhey bud no need to keep your emotions bottled up.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/harlienx900
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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Was this intentional?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jilaXSXL
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
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Wife was not amused

Recently in my neck of the woods, we have been experiencing a cold snap. This morning, my wife set me up for a zinger.

Wife (dressing our 10 month old daughter): I don't know how to dress her.

Me: Shirt goes on the top half, pants on the bottom half.

Wife: No! I mean for the temperature!

Me: Oh! Honey I don't think the temperature cares what she wears today.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/neocontra
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2014
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Customer dadjoked my boss and I tonight. I loved it. His wife and my boss were not amused.

So I work at a pizza shop. This middle aged man, typical dad polo shirt, white New Balances, etc... comes in with his wife. They want subs. So my boss is taking their order. She asks him if he wants any cheese on his sub. He responds "yeah, that religious stuff". My boss looks up at him confused and says, "what?". I immediately jump in and say, "Swiss!" My boss looks even more confused. The guy is smirking and says, "yeah, the holy kind!" His wife lets out the biggest groan as him and I crack up. My boss just shook her head and walked away in disgust.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/relytv2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2014
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How do Vikings send messages ?

With Norse Code!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/frugatti_cuse
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
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What do you call an Iron Wheel at an Amusement Park?

A Ferrous Wheel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arihant1479
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2020
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What do you call an amusement ride made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
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