Dilemma Puns

To mate or to matter

An example of a good dilemma? No problem!

Dad: You know what to do when you have a dilemma? Make dilemma-nade!

I had a more-roll dilemma.

DilEmma

They're always up to something...

Yesterday, I purchased 2 sandwiches because I was very hungry - a chicken salad sandwich and an egg salad sandwich. My dilemma was I had no idea which one I should eat first.

In chat with my project manager:

PM: Yeah, here's a beneficial time for us to be stagged
Me: indeed
PM: That should read staggered, though
Me: we are on the horns of a dilemma
Me: oh deer, that was a lame pun
Me: i should just buck the trend of bad humor
Me: doe! i did it again
PM: ...

Then I pasted the above conversation to another coworker:

Coworker: ha well plaid
Coworker: i meant played
Me: it really was a clash of the tartans

Friends and family seeing my new hair cut for the first time have all asked me the same question:

"Oh, you cut your hair off?"

"No", I respond. I let them struggle with an internal dilemma, doubting reality, wondering if they were losing touch life, until I finally respond, "My hairdresser cut it off."

"My Dad and I were golfing, and he hit his ball. It landed beside a tree. He said 'Son, I have a dilemma.' I replied 'yes? What is it?' Dad: 'Should I go over dilemma or under dilemma'"

(Da-limb-a)

I told my dad that there are dilemmas trilemmas and so forth he says "ya all the way up to the dali lemmas"

To mate or to matter