He chooses the ladder.
Iβm drawing a blank.
-
nerf
The Boo Tea
Because he was outstanding in his field.
It's a fish oil.
He calls it Nyetflix
To me, it's a no-brainer.
It was a thesaurus.
"You're too fat"
I told them that either OR was fine.
However, you werenβt completely clear.
Wrote them down on tiny pieces of paper and shoved them up my nose.
It was still so hard to pick the right answer.
Put a little boogie in it!
It makes a terrible conductor.
Stella AreTwat
After coming home from school, my daughter left her open backpack sprawled on the floor while she was playing in the other room. I was furious and yelled at her.
Me: "Unacceptable! You need to clean up. I hate seeing your backpack in this state!"
She stands up, thinks, looks me in the eye and says: "ok dad, do you want me to send it to Idaho?"
I have no choice but to acknowledge her smarts, high five her and give her the night off from chores.
I still get flashbacks.
He had unlimited dada.
Bad choice. Now all the streets have no name, and I still haven't found what I'm looking for.
I don't know, I don't care.
I guess she'll have to flip a coin....Heads or Tales.
I'll let you know
Wife: whatever floats your boat!
Man: no thatβs buoyancy
No shit Sherlock.
The salesman says:
βCar no do that. Car go road.β
"You know dad, I've never understood why someone would get a degree in something like Egyptology. There's no money in it. What job can you even get with a useless degree like that?"
"Oh, don't be like that son! I'm sure there's plenty of profitable jobs out there you can get by studying Egyptology," the dad replies tactfully.
His son looks at him, interested. "Really? Like what?"
"Why, multi-level marketing, for one!" The dad replies.
Confused, the teen asks him to elaborate. Isn't that a job for someone with a business degree?
The dad shrugs and looks back down at his newspaper. "Well son, it's all a pyramid scheme to me!"
I think it was called Highway To Hell.
Apparently Shatner panties was a poor choice of name.
Apparently it's Head and Shoulders above the rest
*edit: complimented. Damn you autocorrect!!
She says I'm bad with directions. I got so mad that I packed up all my stuff and right.
"We go where you go."
Iβm still standing
