I hate jokes about canoes.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jun 28 2019
There was an amazing discount on canoes at Dick' s sporting goods.
It was quite the oar deal.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 13 2019
The sporting goods store in my town has a sale on canoes
π︎ 11
π
︎ Feb 09 2019
Apparently scientists are working on self driving canoes
They'll be powered by a few row bots
π︎ 37
π
︎ Aug 29 2017
Today I learned that if you're in a canoe and it flips over in water...
....you can safely wear it on your head... because it's capsized.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Feb 23 2021
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Dec 28 2020
How do you row a canoe filled with puppies?
Bring out the doggy paddle.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Apr 04 2021
Did you hear about the guy who lit a fire in his canoe and caused it to sink?
It just goes to show, you can't have your kayak and heat it too!
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 03 2021
My dad once tried making coffee. When he tasted it he said "ahh, like making love in a canoe."
I asked if it was that good, his smile faded and he looked me dead in the eye as he said no, its fucking close to water. He poured it down the drain without losing focus and walked out of the kitchen
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Feb 22 2019
My dad says to me,"Hey,let's go fishing! We'll take the canoe."
I told him,"It's actually pronounced"gnu."The "g" is silent!
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 10 2020
My girlfriend and I broke up at summer camp. We got into an argument over which canoe to get take.
She got in one and I the other. Then we just drifted apart.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 03 2020
I spit on your forking grave.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Mar 22 2021
Drinking American beer is the same as having sex on a canoe.
Itβs f*cking close to water.
π︎ 118
π
︎ Feb 29 2020
Went canoeing with my dad.
I asked if he wanted to man the left or right paddle.
He said either oar.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 27 2020
The sporting goods store downtown was having a big sale on canoe paddles, but traffic and road construction made it real pain to get there...
...yeah, it was quite the ordeal to get the oar deal.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 08 2020
what do you call a canoe that's 50% off?
π︎ 66
π
︎ Feb 23 2020
During a recent camping trip, my son rigged his drone to paddle his canoe for him. He called it the "DronePaddle3000".
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jun 08 2020
We were camping near the lake and my wife wanted to go canoeing...
She asked: "Which paddle should I take? The short wooden one, the long metal one?
I replied: "Doesn't matter, its either-oar situation"
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jun 12 2020
What does Donald Trump call kayaks?
π︎ 33
π
︎ Oct 23 2020
My dad would always tell me that, if my canoe flipped over, I could just use it as a hat...
π︎ 98
π
︎ Sep 17 2018
My son just bought a 27-foot long canoe.
He told me it was really expensive because its material, kevlar, its seats, leather, and the hull, 9 yards.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 28 2018
I can't think of a better way to cross the lake
π︎ 12
π
︎ Dec 29 2020
What is the best way to steer a canoe?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Dec 11 2017
My buddy founded a canoe business thatβs really taking off.
I had the same idea, but I missed the boat.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Sep 10 2018
What did the President decide to name his brand new canoe after leaving the store?
π︎ 29
π
︎ May 08 2016
My wife told me she's slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer !
Don't worry guys, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf
π︎ 75
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
Which paddle do you use when you sit in the front of a canoe?
π︎ 29
π
︎ Jun 04 2018
What do you call an old canoe?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jun 29 2018
What do you call a mechanical man paddling a canoe?
π︎ 31
π
︎ Sep 10 2017
Passionate man paddling a canoe:
Some oak on the water; there's fire in this guy.
π︎ 22
π
︎ Jul 01 2016
We have a metal paddle for our canoe...
I told the kids it's iron oar.
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 30 2018
How do you make any boat a hat?
You flip it over and it becomes capsized.
π︎ 81
π
︎ Jun 16 2020
What do you call a bot that likes to sit in a canoe?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jul 06 2015
I was cold while in my kayak so I lit a fire and it sunk
Shows you canβt have your kayak and heat it too!
π︎ 26
π
︎ May 10 2020
Went to the boundary waters for canoeing recently
While there, I picked up my phone and said "Hello, Yeah this is him. On my way."
Looked over at my friends and said, "oh don't worry, that was just nature calling" and headed towards the bathroom. I could hear groans behind me.
Yeah... They almost left me there
π︎ 9
π
︎ May 28 2015
My brother refers to light beer as "making love in a canoe"
Because it's f***ing near water.
(He doesn't even have kids, so I guess it's an uncle joke)
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 12 2015
The sporting goods store just had a big sale on canoes
It was quite the oar deal
π︎ 8
π
︎ Mar 29 2019
Today I learned that if a canoe turns upside down in the water, you can safely wear it on your head.
π︎ 842
π
︎ Dec 29 2020
There was a big sale on canoe paddles at the store today.
It was quite an oar deal.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jul 16 2020
TIL: If your canoe turns upside down in the water, you can wear it on your head.
π︎ 215
π
︎ Oct 23 2019
When you barf in a canoe...
π︎ 6
π
︎ Apr 09 2020
this coffee is like having sex in a canoe
itβs fucking close to water
π︎ 22
π
︎ Jul 10 2019
What have american beer and sex in a canoe in common?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Mar 01 2019
The canoe store has a big sale last week.
It was quite the oar deal.
π︎ 48
π
︎ Sep 26 2018
Drinking my coffee this morning was like making love on a canoe
It's fucking close to water.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 22 2017
What does Trump call kayaks?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jun 08 2020
TIL: If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head.
π︎ 854
π
︎ Jul 07 2019
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
