Manuel Machado, CD National coach, "Those gentlemen who have monkey behaviour, they could put the nails in their anal callosities. Any monkey has them and they must have them too." streamable.com/n55ayx
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LIS1050010
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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I have a friend who constantly wants to shake my hand but he has callosity on his hands. How can I avoid shaking his hand?

He said it's not contagious but I just don't feel comfortable shake his hand. The problem is that I shake hands with everyone else so he would know for sure something's wrong if I stopped shaking his hand. Edit: I'm a girl.(don't know if that makes a difference)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ermy_ara
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2018
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Callosity - Going Ghost youtu.be/VmJ5_l2Degw
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spieslikechris
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2019
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TIL that there is a scientific term for the big hard parts on certain monkeys' bottoms (mandrills have colourful ones, for example). They're called "ischial callosities". onlinelibrary.wiley.com/d…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Not_a_Nautilus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2013
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Gamers with Split-Brain (callosal syndrome) what is playing playing video games like?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/guppy65456
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
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Patients with a Split-Brain, or Callosal Syndrome, what are the craziest things that have happened because if your condition?
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2020
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People with callosal syndrome (split brain) must be really good at dual-wielding swords

They should be stunt doubles in like star wars or something

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PDanasten
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
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Not so fake Whatsapp post - higer levels of Black fungus cases in COVID patients

So, here's another whatsapp post I'm seeing more and more on my groups. There are parts of this that are true and parts that aren't. Of course since this is an emerging concern, my research might not be up-to-date if this is read in a few days.

There seems to be a Black Fungus that targets those who have "uncontrolled Diabetes" during COVID. This could be people who have undiagnosed diabetes, or blood sugar levels not being maintained during the treatment of COVID. Calls for doctors to maintain diabetics sugar within proper range, and appropriate doses of steroids.

More can be read below:

https://www.deccanherald.com/state/top-karnataka-stories/rising-black-fungus-cases-among-covid-19-patients-in-karnataka-raises-alarm-984224.html

https://indianexpress.com/article/explained/mucormycosis-in-covid-patients-fungal-infections-7308721/

https://news.abplive.com/health/fatal-black-fungal-infection-in-covid-patients-on-rise-centre-issues-list-of-dos-and-donts-1457582

The whatsapp forward for your reading pleasure: This is a discussion happening on my course mates group! Looked relevant so sharing it here!!

WHO IS KILLING HUNDREDS OF THOSE WHO HAVE JUST DEFEATED COVID. IT'S BLACK FUNGUS

Dear all,

This is to bring to your information a dangerous disease which is killing people by the hundreds AFTER they have recovered from the dreaded Covid-19 infection.

The disease is Mucormycosis and can be fatal. It catches on to those who have been on oxygen support for five days or more. So, the oxygen which gives you life, actually becomes your death sentence. It's that dangerous.

Mucormycosis, simply known as Black Fungus, develops in the nasal tract due to poor quality of water used, through which the piped oxygen in hospitals passes to make it hydrated oxygen, before it reaches the patient's nostrils. It's very much like the fungus which develops on bread due to moisture, if kept for a long time.

It starts from the nostril, travels towards the eye and then towards the brain. It paralyses the nerves it travels through. So, first it’s the eye that loses vision very swiftly AND permanently! If not stopped, it enters the brain and then it's a matter of a day or two before the person paralyses, has multiple organ failure or sudden heart attack and dies

For any body on oxygen support in a hospital, it's crucial to keep looking around the nostrils for any black pigmentation. As soon as it's noticed even as the smallest dot, sirens should ring, and anti-fungal vacci

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/anjibern
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
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(Warning: Morbid dad joke) True Story -- My family were planning my mum's funeral. We always try to keep things light and try to stay positive, just as Mum would have it...

The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.

Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.

The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:

"What's sarong with that?"

I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).

His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.

--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)

--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zipflop
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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If my son ever came out to be trans then I wouldn’t have a son anymore

I would have a daughter

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Captbeauner
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
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Ah yes, pretty hip
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πŸ‘€︎ u/entertainer011
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
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Dis-a-
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πŸ‘€︎ u/krismoff
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
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Don't know if this was posted here before
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πŸ‘€︎ u/choclite69
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
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Bill and Melinda Gates got divorced. Melinda got the house...

But Bill kept the Windows

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScubaPride
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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From my 5-year-old son: "Hey"

True story; it even happened last night. My 5-year-old son walks up behind me and out of the blue says, "hey."

I turn to him and say, "yeah, kiddo? What's up?"

He responds, "it's dead grass."

I'm really confused and trying to figure out what's wrong and what he wants from me. "What? There's dead grass? What's wrong with that?"

.

.

.

He says, totally straight-faced, "hay is dead grass," and runs off.

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πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
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What rhymes with orange.

No it doesn't.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Remo1975
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
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There will be point in the future when Canada will take over the world.

And then you will all be sorry.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
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My Bluetooth speaker wasn’t working so I threw it into the lake.

Now it’s syncing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2021
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In surgery my doctor said, "So what do we have here?" I replied that I broke my arm in 12 places."

He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAzrael2013
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
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To the person who stole my MS Office License.

I will find you. You have my Word.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Regclusive
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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I told my wife I saw a deer on the way to work.

She said how do you know he was headed to work?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
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In honor of Mother’s Day, I’d just like to say,

β€œthank you for your cervix.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rusto_Dusto
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
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He is right there...
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jointly_epic
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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Sponge bob | (β€’)(β€’) | , Patrick / (β€’)(β€’) \ , Squidward ( (β€’)(β€’) ) , Plankton | (β€’) | , Mr. Krabs |β€’| |β€’|

Made me smile

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πŸ‘€︎ u/marinmarge
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
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I got banned from /r/DadJokes for posting, "Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms!"

Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
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I've started a boat building business in my attic...

...sails are going through the roof.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xholdsteadyx
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
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Initially I didn’t believe that my chiropractor was any good.

But now I stand corrected.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2021
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*Triggering britishers*
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/potato_patataa
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Guys, today was my first day in the navy and I felt so lost!

Wait. Sorry, wrong sub.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nikolai_G
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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And on that note
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcastic_gooner
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2021
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