I have to go back to one of the few I know of that has one today. Not looking forward to it. The last time I was there, the owners were there for a few minutes and then left. I watched the pitbulls demeanor change completely when they were gone.
He was telling me he’s the boss of the house. Although he did eventually settle down and rest, I’m still so uncomfortable with jobs that include shitbulls.
I’m about to go in to see my boss for the short 5 minutes I see her every morning.. going to let her know if a pitbull ever attacks me, I’m suing the homeowners insurance big time. That is, if I get away alive of course.
I had a stupid chihuahua attack me about a month ago, but NOTHING can prepare someone for a pit attack. This subreddit can a little bit, but I bet it’s still a huge shock to witness or be involved in, although we are well informed here.
Anyway- wish me luck. I really don’t like this fucking house and that dog. Especially after witnessing his temperament change the way it did. Guess I’m living on the edge today.
Edit:; after talking to my boss they actually moved me to a different job :) I told them it was appreciated
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Do your worst!
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
But that’s comparing apples to oranges
They’re on standbi
A play on words.
My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Or would that be too forward thinking?
